*WARNING: This podcast mentions suicide, abuse & trauma and may be triggering.
Episode Summary
Season Five of The Survivors took us into some of the hardest, most honest conversations we’ve had yet.
Across 14 episodes, we talked about what happens after someone says “I’m fine.” We explored how our identities change after life changes us, what it means to live with suicide loss, grief as it’s actually happening, Pride and LGBTQ+ experiences, menopause and mental health, family estrangement, inpatient psychiatric care, surviving domestic abuse, surviving carbon monoxide poisoning, and the conversations that can help connect someone who’s struggling with the support they need.
But more than anything, this season was about what it means to survive.
We heard from people who’ve lived through experiences they never expected to face—and who were willing to talk openly about what happened, what helped, what didn’t, and what life looks like on the other side. Their stories reminded us that resilience doesn’t always look like strength. Sometimes it looks like asking for help. Setting a boundary. Leaving. Staying. Starting over. Telling the truth. Or simply getting through the next day.
In this Season Five wrap-up, we revisit some of the guests and conversations that stayed with us, the lessons they shared, and the practical takeaways we can all use when we’re struggling—or when someone we care about is.
And we celebrate something pretty incredible: The Survivors is now being heard in all 50 states and more than 90 countries. What started as a place for honest conversations has become a growing community of people around the world who understand one simple truth: We’re all surviving something.
To every guest who trusted us with their story and every listener who listened, shared an episode, reached out, or came back week after week—thank you for being part of Season Five.
And we’re not slowing down.
Season Six starts next week, with more real stories, honest conversations, practical resources, and people willing to talk about the things we don’t talk about nearly enough.
If you or someone you know is struggling, call or text 988 for immediate support, and visit TheHelpHUB.co for trauma-informed resources, tools, and support.
Episode Sponsored by The HelpHUB™
Struggling with your mental health? Feeling lost, overwhelmed, or just alone? Well, you're not. Welcome to The HelpHUB™—your online destination for mental health resources, treatment options, content, and tools to help meet you exactly where you are in the moment. Visit TheHelpHUB.co to get started.
Takeaways
- The lie of being 'fine' and the importance of honesty
- Dealing with the realization of not being who you used to be
- The impact of grief and the loneliness it brings
- Surviving estrangement and toxic relationships
- The journey of coming out and embracing pride
- Experiences with menopause and hormonal changes
- The power of seeking help through inpatient hospitalization
- Escaping abusive relationships and advocating for change
- Losing loved ones to suicide and honoring their memory
- Building resilience through life's hardest challenges
Chapters
00:00 - Season 5 Recap and Highlights 02:04 - The Lie We Tell Ourselves: 'I'm Fine' 04:54 - Realizing You're Not Who You Used to Be 13:52 - The Loneliness of Grief and Loss 21:57 - Estrangement and Setting Boundaries 30:00 - Losing a Spouse to Suicide: Resilience and Hope 37:07 - Surviving and Escaping Abuse 43:51 - The Power of Honest Conversations 46:55 - Season 6 Preview and Gratitude
Mental Health Resources
- If you or someone you know is struggling, please call 988 for help.
- The Survivors Podcast Website – https://thesurvivors.net/
- National Domestic Violence Hotline – Call 1-800-799-SAFE (7223)
- Surviving: Finding Hope After Suicide Loss (Familius Books)
- The HelpHUB™ – Mental health resources, tools, and support networks – https://www.thehelphub.co/
Follow & Connect With Us
📷 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/the_survivors_podcast
🔗 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-survivors-podcast
🎥 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheSurvivorsPodcastChannel
🎵📱TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thesurvivorspodcast
See you next week! In the meantime, keep surviving.
00:00:01 --> 00:00:04 Hey friends, before we dive into this week's episode, just a heads up.
00:00:05 --> 00:00:09 Our podcast talks about suicide, sexual abuse, and other trauma,
00:00:09 --> 00:00:13 and some of what you hear may be triggering. So please listen with care.
00:00:13 --> 00:00:18 This is The Survivors. Real stories, raw conversations, and the truth about
00:00:18 --> 00:00:21 what it means to keep going after the hardest things.
00:00:22 --> 00:00:25 We're so glad you're here. Let's keep surviving together.
00:00:26 --> 00:00:32 I love that we start the final wrap-up episode laughing, just like we started
00:00:32 --> 00:00:34 the first episode of the season laughing.
00:00:34 --> 00:00:39 So, okay, this is always a little bittersweet because we're ending another season,
00:00:39 --> 00:00:45 but the sweetness is that we get to do a whole season six right after this one.
00:00:45 --> 00:00:49 I cannot believe, we say it every single time, here we are again,
00:00:49 --> 00:00:53 I cannot believe, season five, done. And we're about to recap.
00:00:54 --> 00:00:59 I just I genuinely feel like they speed up every season and they are still 15
00:00:59 --> 00:01:01 week seasons nothing changes,
00:01:02 --> 00:01:06 it's so bizarre that they seem to keep going faster do you get that I mean it's
00:01:06 --> 00:01:09 like a bra off at a concert it just gone.
00:01:12 --> 00:01:15 I didn't see that coming it's very funny I didn't either just popped in my head,
00:01:16 --> 00:01:21 oh my god welcome to my brain yeah that's okay we like being in your brain so,
00:01:21 --> 00:01:27 So, okay, I went back through our calendar, which is right here in front of me off the screen,
00:01:27 --> 00:01:30 to kind of get my thoughts around this season.
00:01:30 --> 00:01:35 And I keep having the same thing in my mind. We got to do this like spark notes.
00:01:35 --> 00:01:39 And I think I said this in the previous episode that that's what this is going to be.
00:01:39 --> 00:01:43 It's what it always is. It's like a couple minutes dedicated to each episode
00:01:43 --> 00:01:47 just to kind of recap the highlights and the lowlights and really encourage
00:01:47 --> 00:01:51 people who maybe are just hearing this recap episode for the first time.
00:01:52 --> 00:01:55 Time if you're here and this is the first time you're ever hearing us hey thanks
00:01:55 --> 00:01:58 for being here we're glad you're listening to us go back and listen to all the
00:01:58 --> 00:02:01 other episodes because it'll be worth it so this will kind of give you a sense
00:02:01 --> 00:02:06 of of what they're about so or you could always listen to this episode and,
00:02:06 --> 00:02:10 kind of be like okay that episode sounds interesting that episode sounds interesting
00:02:10 --> 00:02:16 which is why i like that like that we do this yeah i know same same so.
00:02:17 --> 00:02:21 As always, every episode showed us something very, very different.
00:02:21 --> 00:02:25 Sometimes we talked about, obviously, surviving, losing somebody you love,
00:02:25 --> 00:02:28 figuring out how the hell you keep going without them.
00:02:28 --> 00:02:31 Sometimes it was leaving a relationship. We've talked a lot about that.
00:02:32 --> 00:02:37 Sometimes we've talked about accepting a relationship with somebody you love may need to end.
00:02:37 --> 00:02:41 There's so many different things that we survive. I think our new tagline at
00:02:41 --> 00:02:45 this stage of the game is we're all surviving something and we're surviving
00:02:45 --> 00:02:49 it together here in this community. So, um.
00:02:50 --> 00:02:54 Let's just dive headfirst backwards into episode one.
00:02:55 --> 00:03:00 We talked all about the whole lie that we all tell ourselves a lot of the time,
00:03:00 --> 00:03:02 not all the time, the I'm fine.
00:03:03 --> 00:03:07 That was, I think, a really powerful way to start the whole season.
00:03:08 --> 00:03:13 Because I think those little words touched everything that we talked about the
00:03:13 --> 00:03:15 rest of the season for us.
00:03:16 --> 00:03:19 I mean, how many times has somebody asked you that question or how many times
00:03:19 --> 00:03:22 have you asked, how are you? You say you're fine.
00:03:23 --> 00:03:25 You don't think about it. It's automatic.
00:03:25 --> 00:03:29 You know you're not or you know the person is not.
00:03:30 --> 00:03:36 What we really decided, I think, in that episode, and tell me what you think,
00:03:36 --> 00:03:40 but it's that we have to just be honest.
00:03:41 --> 00:03:47 Yeah, and it takes a tremendous amount of courage on both sides of that conversation, to be honest.
00:03:47 --> 00:03:52 And my always, when somebody asks me if I'm okay and I say I'm fine and they
00:03:52 --> 00:03:55 continue to press it, I just say I'm tired.
00:03:55 --> 00:03:57 I throw that I'm fine, I'm just tired.
00:03:58 --> 00:04:04 So is that your code word for I'm really bad and you need to start asking more questions?
00:04:05 --> 00:04:10 Probably. All right, duly noted. Or if I sleep a lot, or if I'm just a withdrawal.
00:04:10 --> 00:04:13 But nobody would know that except for my husband and kids, too, you know?
00:04:13 --> 00:04:17 Yeah. It's really, I think, it comes down to listening to your intuition when
00:04:17 --> 00:04:18 you're talking to somebody.
00:04:19 --> 00:04:23 And allowing yourself to actually fully be present in the moment,
00:04:23 --> 00:04:27 having a conversation with somebody, even if it's a co-worker.
00:04:27 --> 00:04:31 You know, because there's that line of, how much do I want to know this person
00:04:31 --> 00:04:34 if they're a co-worker, too? So...
00:04:35 --> 00:04:40 But I have a couple of very dear friends at work that I open up to,
00:04:40 --> 00:04:42 and they can tell when I'm not okay.
00:04:43 --> 00:04:46 So it's, you know, having those few people in different areas of your life,
00:04:46 --> 00:04:49 I think, are very important that you can be open and honest with.
00:04:49 --> 00:04:53 Yeah, yeah, I agree with that. And I also think that the message,
00:04:53 --> 00:04:58 the underlying message of that episode was that we all probably need to get
00:04:58 --> 00:05:04 a little bit better at having those conversations that go beyond the surface.
00:05:04 --> 00:05:07 So that was the essence of that episode.
00:05:07 --> 00:05:11 Then we just slid right into number two for the season.
00:05:11 --> 00:05:16 And that episode was the day that, this is a good one, the day that you realize
00:05:16 --> 00:05:18 that you're not who you used to be.
00:05:19 --> 00:05:25 And I loved this conversation because I think there's something incredibly universal about that.
00:05:25 --> 00:05:31 At some point in our life, most of us look at ourselves and we realize that
00:05:31 --> 00:05:33 we're not the same person that we used to be.
00:05:33 --> 00:05:35 We're 10 years ago, five years ago, a year ago.
00:05:35 --> 00:05:39 And sometimes it's a gradual change. Sometimes it happens because we lost our
00:05:39 --> 00:05:44 partner or we lost our job or we lost our home or whatever it is or a mental
00:05:44 --> 00:05:46 health crisis, whatever it is.
00:05:47 --> 00:05:49 And that can be really, really unsettling. And we talked a lot about,
00:05:49 --> 00:05:50 like, how do you deal with that?
00:05:51 --> 00:05:57 How do you deal with the idea of I'm not either who I used to be and I want
00:05:57 --> 00:06:02 to be that person or I'm not who I expected to be at this point in time?
00:06:03 --> 00:06:05 What's going on? Where's the disconnect?
00:06:06 --> 00:06:09 And I think that that was a really powerful conversation.
00:06:10 --> 00:06:12 And I think the important thing with that is.
00:06:13 --> 00:06:16 When you wake up one day and you realize, hey, I'm not this person who I want
00:06:16 --> 00:06:20 to be, and you need to have this conversation with yourself,
00:06:20 --> 00:06:23 okay, am I happy with who I am?
00:06:24 --> 00:06:28 Can I feel joy with this version of myself? Yes or no?
00:06:29 --> 00:06:31 It's kind of like one of those thought trees kind of situation.
00:06:32 --> 00:06:35 If the answer is no, maybe think back to a time when you were like,
00:06:35 --> 00:06:37 okay, I liked that version of myself.
00:06:38 --> 00:06:44 Can I get can I number one get back to that version or do I even want to yeah
00:06:44 --> 00:06:45 that's and then know that,
00:06:46 --> 00:06:49 in any time in your life you can
00:06:49 --> 00:06:53 choose to take those amazing versions of yourself and bring that forward,
00:06:54 --> 00:06:59 and continue to grow and become you know for me that's what I strive for is
00:06:59 --> 00:07:03 I have this like goal version of myself and that's what I'm striving for is
00:07:03 --> 00:07:08 to be this version of myself that I know I can be, and I want to be, and,
00:07:09 --> 00:07:13 bringing forth those past versions of myself that will.
00:07:14 --> 00:07:16 Support me in reaching that goal.
00:07:16 --> 00:07:20 Yeah, I think that's an important thing to note. And I think that what goes
00:07:20 --> 00:07:25 kind of hand in hand with that, because change is inevitable to all of us.
00:07:26 --> 00:07:29 And, you know, some things that are within our control and some things that are not.
00:07:29 --> 00:07:33 And I think that one of the more important parts of that conversation that we
00:07:33 --> 00:07:38 had was that it's okay and it's actually necessary,
00:07:38 --> 00:07:44 to grieve those parts of us or those periods of our life that we've,
00:07:45 --> 00:07:49 left behind or that we've lost or that we just can't recover for whatever reason
00:07:49 --> 00:07:51 because it's just part of the bigger story.
00:07:52 --> 00:08:00 And we do reserve the right to grieve those things too, even as we move forward,
00:08:01 --> 00:08:02 because it's just a part of us.
00:08:03 --> 00:08:05 So I liked that conversation. I.
00:08:06 --> 00:08:10 From there, we had a lot of guests this season.
00:08:10 --> 00:08:14 We had a lot of guests this season. And that was something that you and I have
00:08:14 --> 00:08:21 tried to really start to integrate into the podcast and bring into this community.
00:08:21 --> 00:08:27 And, whoa, did we start with like a heavy, hard, amazing, amazing conversation.
00:08:27 --> 00:08:31 We, episodes three and four, so we did a two-parter, we've done a couple of
00:08:31 --> 00:08:32 two-parters this season.
00:08:33 --> 00:08:39 Episodes three and four, we brought in mental health. She's a fairly new mental
00:08:39 --> 00:08:45 health advocate. She's also a suicide loss survivor. Her name's Allie Skarbek.
00:08:45 --> 00:08:51 She is a TikTok influencer. She was very, very unexpected TikTok influencer, if you ask Allie.
00:08:52 --> 00:08:54 And she lost her son, Alex, to suicide.
00:08:54 --> 00:08:57 And this was one of those episodes, I don't know about you, but this was one
00:08:57 --> 00:09:02 of those episodes for me that before I even started recording.
00:09:03 --> 00:09:06 You knew that you were being trusted with something really important.
00:09:06 --> 00:09:11 Her story is very complex, very hard to hear.
00:09:12 --> 00:09:18 The circumstances around her son's death were very tough to listen to because
00:09:18 --> 00:09:24 he was staying at a family member's home, trying to kind of work and find his way.
00:09:25 --> 00:09:30 And the family knew that he had had mental health issues, knew that he had been
00:09:30 --> 00:09:33 suicidal, knew that he had a firearm, knew that he had been threatening his life.
00:09:34 --> 00:09:40 And they were all there in the house when he threatened that he was about to
00:09:40 --> 00:09:43 take his life with a firearm and he did it.
00:09:43 --> 00:09:47 And they recorded it on Snapchat. And it just gutted me, that whole,
00:09:48 --> 00:09:51 I don't know what you're, when you think back to that.
00:09:52 --> 00:09:56 Well, do you remember that we were supposed to record two episodes back to back?
00:09:56 --> 00:10:03 Yeah, yeah, yeah. And because it was so heavy to listen to when she was in it, they recorded it.
00:10:03 --> 00:10:06 Because I've lost five brothers to suicide.
00:10:06 --> 00:10:09 And four of those have been with self-inflicted gunshot wounds.
00:10:09 --> 00:10:11 And that's how Alex took his life.
00:10:12 --> 00:10:20 And it just brought me back to, even though nobody was there with,
00:10:20 --> 00:10:21 well, So Clayne's family was
00:10:22 --> 00:10:25 there in the home and his wife and children are the ones that found him.
00:10:25 --> 00:10:31 But it just, it like threw me back into, it was almost like I was each one of
00:10:31 --> 00:10:33 my brothers in that moment when they pulled the trigger.
00:10:34 --> 00:10:39 And we had to stop recording. Like we couldn't go on to record the second part because I was a mess.
00:10:39 --> 00:10:44 Yeah, I remember that. And so that's why, you know, we understand as we're recording
00:10:44 --> 00:10:48 this, if we as, you know, the co-hosts of this podcast struggle ourselves to
00:10:48 --> 00:10:52 listen to this stuff, we get that it could be hard for you.
00:10:52 --> 00:10:57 But at the same time, it is so incredibly important and therapeutic to talk
00:10:57 --> 00:11:01 about these things and to share with others because we never know whose life
00:11:01 --> 00:11:02 we're going to impact in the future. Sure.
00:11:03 --> 00:11:08 Right, right. And I'll tell you, Allie has been doing some incredible work impacting
00:11:08 --> 00:11:12 people's lives, especially parents who have lost children to suicide.
00:11:13 --> 00:11:15 So all of all of our guests.
00:11:16 --> 00:11:20 Yeah, her posts are so powerful. I mean, sometimes I see her posts and I just
00:11:20 --> 00:11:23 I'm like, girl, let's rip my heart out.
00:11:24 --> 00:11:27 I know. Well, it's true. It's true. So we'll have, obviously,
00:11:27 --> 00:11:32 for any of the guests that we had this season, we will add their contact info
00:11:32 --> 00:11:36 and their platforms to the show notes at the end of this episode.
00:11:36 --> 00:11:42 I highly recommend everybody follow every single one of our guests this season
00:11:42 --> 00:11:45 because they were just tremendous people with huge hearts and the same kind
00:11:45 --> 00:11:47 of mission that we have to do.
00:11:47 --> 00:11:53 To create change and impact people in positive ways. So then it was episode
00:11:53 --> 00:11:55 five, and it was Pride Month.
00:11:55 --> 00:11:59 And that, you know, I get all crazy excited for Pride Month.
00:12:00 --> 00:12:05 And we talked about so many different aspects of pride. We talked about why
00:12:05 --> 00:12:12 pride still matters. We talked about what pride was for you and for me and for you.
00:12:12 --> 00:12:18 I'll let you reveal the earlier reveal about Pride month. Go ahead.
00:12:19 --> 00:12:21 I basically just came out of the closet right then and there.
00:12:22 --> 00:12:23 That's it. It was amazing.
00:12:24 --> 00:12:31 I told, you know, my family, I think it was, I officially came out in 2018 as
00:12:31 --> 00:12:36 by to my family and close friends, but I hadn't ever been public about it,
00:12:36 --> 00:12:40 you know, because I live in a world of not everybody needs to know your business.
00:12:41 --> 00:12:45 Yeah, I live in that world too. I don't, I only share what I choose to share.
00:12:45 --> 00:12:47 And you're right. You're right.
00:12:47 --> 00:12:52 And so you came out with, well, what's pride to you? And I was just like, I don't know.
00:12:54 --> 00:13:01 I've just never, I guess, had the opportunity to really experience what gay
00:13:01 --> 00:13:05 pride is, to be perfectly honest. I've never been to it.
00:13:05 --> 00:13:09 And I've never been surrounded by so many like-minded people in that regard.
00:13:09 --> 00:13:14 So I kind of, I guess I need to experience that is what I'm getting to.
00:13:15 --> 00:13:18 Well, I love that. To really have that sense of pride. Yep. I love that you
00:13:18 --> 00:13:22 feel that way. And keep in mind, and we talked about this in that episode, that...
00:13:23 --> 00:13:28 Everyone's definition of what Pride is and what Pride means to us as individual
00:13:28 --> 00:13:32 humans is very, very different. So I love the fact that you kind of started
00:13:32 --> 00:13:37 that journey of exploring that in that, like, real-time moment.
00:13:38 --> 00:13:43 I just loved it in that moment. So that is an episode to listen to, for sure.
00:13:43 --> 00:13:48 And then, okay, we, again, a lot of gear shifting this season.
00:13:48 --> 00:13:51 We shifted right out of Pride, and episode six, we talked about...
00:13:52 --> 00:13:57 Grief in real time, like what is it like, and this affects so many people,
00:13:57 --> 00:14:02 and this is not at all specific to suicide loss, which we talk a lot about.
00:14:02 --> 00:14:08 This is what happens when you have experienced a loss, but the world around
00:14:08 --> 00:14:10 you just keeps spinning like any old given Sunday.
00:14:11 --> 00:14:14 And that one I think really,
00:14:15 --> 00:14:20 hit both you and I because I was experiencing the loss of my mother-in-law who
00:14:20 --> 00:14:25 of course we're still grieving for she passed away at the end of January and
00:14:25 --> 00:14:30 we talked a lot you and I about that that feeling when your whole world is consumed,
00:14:30 --> 00:14:34 by the grief and the loss that you've just experienced and.
00:14:35 --> 00:14:40 The colors aren't vibrant anymore and you don't want to be out You're interacting
00:14:40 --> 00:14:42 with people. Your social meter is gone.
00:14:42 --> 00:14:50 And your battery is completely run down. And yet everybody around you is functioning business as usual.
00:14:50 --> 00:14:56 And it's really, really hard. And that just exposed a bigger conversation about,
00:14:56 --> 00:14:59 the real true loneliness of grief. Mm-hmm.
00:14:59 --> 00:15:04 And there's no way around that. It is incredibly isolating.
00:15:04 --> 00:15:08 Even being surrounded by my family members, multiple siblings,
00:15:08 --> 00:15:15 going through the same loss, we each had to find our way out of that darkness, oftentimes alone.
00:15:16 --> 00:15:20 You know, unless it was, you know, in the early stages, we would often get together
00:15:21 --> 00:15:24 each morning for breakfast or for coffee or whatever, just...
00:15:25 --> 00:15:29 To have that closeness but as the weeks and months went on each one of us kind
00:15:29 --> 00:15:32 of reverted into our own little kind of like cocoon,
00:15:33 --> 00:15:38 to try and process the loss that was just recurrent and recurrent and just,
00:15:39 --> 00:15:43 sometimes that's what it takes to get through it is to just revert back into
00:15:43 --> 00:15:47 yourself and just be like okay i can get through this it is day by day sometimes
00:15:47 --> 00:15:49 moment by moment or even breath by breath,
00:15:50 --> 00:15:54 yeah and that's how it can fill with with grief for for a lot of people I feel like.
00:15:54 --> 00:15:58 Oh, it absolutely can. But there's that part, especially when it's so fresh
00:15:58 --> 00:16:02 and brand new, when you're just like, why is everybody not seeing what's in my heart?
00:16:02 --> 00:16:08 Why is everybody not feeling the same grief and loneliness and sadness and despair
00:16:08 --> 00:16:12 that I am? And then you have to kind of like snap back into reality and say,
00:16:12 --> 00:16:14 well, wait a minute, because I'm the one who lost somebody.
00:16:15 --> 00:16:18 Their life is going on. Exactly.
00:16:18 --> 00:16:23 Exactly. So that was a really helpful conversation for me personally just kind
00:16:23 --> 00:16:28 of as that reminder in that moment of feeling that actual feeling of why does
00:16:28 --> 00:16:30 everybody not notice that i'm really upset here.
00:16:31 --> 00:16:35 And that was i had shared a quote or you i can't remember around the time that
00:16:35 --> 00:16:38 we had aired that episode and it was like,
00:16:39 --> 00:16:45 grief is a scream that only you can hear yes you did that was that was a really
00:16:45 --> 00:16:49 powerful quote you did share that and it's so true it's the best way to really,
00:16:50 --> 00:16:54 kind of capture the essence of what that right whole conversation was your heart
00:16:54 --> 00:16:59 is just screaming at the loss but only you can hear it yeah yeah that's a great
00:16:59 --> 00:17:01 you're very profound you know,
00:17:02 --> 00:17:09 your your utah wisdom i love it it's called life wisdom yeah right right i've
00:17:09 --> 00:17:13 lived 50 11 lives over here 50 11 lives big number.
00:17:14 --> 00:17:20 All right. So then rolled into episode seven, which you and I,
00:17:20 --> 00:17:22 oh, baby, this was an episode.
00:17:22 --> 00:17:26 It was surviving because we don't just talk about surviving grief and suicide.
00:17:26 --> 00:17:30 We're just talking about all the things that we survive and we are surviving
00:17:30 --> 00:17:37 perimenopause, menopause, and postmenopause because I am at the post end.
00:17:37 --> 00:17:41 You are at the peri end. Peri part, just getting started. Yep.
00:17:42 --> 00:17:46 Yep. Yep. And I have obviously been through all three of those stages.
00:17:47 --> 00:17:52 And oh, mama, was that a conversation. It felt so good to just be like,
00:17:53 --> 00:17:55 man, my ear. Do you know that my ear has been itching?
00:17:55 --> 00:17:58 You came up with some crazy statistic. Do you remember that?
00:17:58 --> 00:17:59 You came up with the ear itching.
00:18:00 --> 00:18:04 And that clip got some good traction online. It did. It got like thousands of
00:18:04 --> 00:18:10 people were responding or listening to that clip about how your ear starts itching
00:18:10 --> 00:18:14 uncontrollably for no reason. And at that time, that was what was happening to me.
00:18:14 --> 00:18:18 But, you know, we just talked about it was like a great bonding experience.
00:18:18 --> 00:18:22 I feel like not only for you and I in that moment, but also for the listeners,
00:18:22 --> 00:18:29 because there was so much chatter in all of our social media posts among women
00:18:29 --> 00:18:30 being like, me too, me too.
00:18:30 --> 00:18:33 Oh, my God. What about this? What about that? And it just felt so validating
00:18:33 --> 00:18:35 because you get dismissed.
00:18:36 --> 00:18:40 You go in and you see your primary care and they want to attribute whatever
00:18:40 --> 00:18:43 it is that's going on to something else. It's always something else. It's never...
00:18:44 --> 00:18:47 The possibility of it being menopause or perimenopause or all that.
00:18:47 --> 00:18:52 So that was a really, not only funny, but very validating episode.
00:18:52 --> 00:18:57 It was. And I can say I'm officially a month in on HRT, hormone replacement
00:18:57 --> 00:19:01 therapy. They started me up on a very low dose, semi-weekly patch.
00:19:02 --> 00:19:07 Very minor side effects. And so, and I love that, you know, I got a full blood
00:19:07 --> 00:19:08 panel of everything run.
00:19:09 --> 00:19:14 And she's like, okay, but we're not going off labs. She's like, how do you feel?
00:19:14 --> 00:19:16 See, that's so important. I said, I don't feel any different.
00:19:16 --> 00:19:19 She's like, okay, so what are the three top things that you want to feel better on?
00:19:20 --> 00:19:25 I said, sleep, brain fog, and just like my mood swings.
00:19:26 --> 00:19:30 And she's like, great. So she actually bumped me up like two doses. Okay.
00:19:30 --> 00:19:34 Again, it's very small doses. And so she's like, all right, we'll check back in two weeks.
00:19:34 --> 00:19:38 But we're going off based on how you feel, not your lab work.
00:19:38 --> 00:19:43 That is such an important question for practitioners to ask.
00:19:43 --> 00:19:46 Because I think, I'm not a medical professional, I don't claim to be,
00:19:47 --> 00:19:48 but in my own lived experience,
00:19:49 --> 00:19:56 the medical profession does tend to lean heavily toward, okay,
00:19:56 --> 00:19:59 here's what the lab showed, the tests showed, the results showed,
00:20:00 --> 00:20:04 and it turns out that it doesn't.
00:20:05 --> 00:20:10 It may show that, but it doesn't necessarily relate to the full problem.
00:20:10 --> 00:20:14 There are other factors in play. So, So I'm happy for that. And by the way,
00:20:14 --> 00:20:16 you did promise that you were going to give an update on that.
00:20:16 --> 00:20:17 So this is perfect timing.
00:20:17 --> 00:20:21 Yes. Now everybody has your update. I think in about six months,
00:20:21 --> 00:20:22 probably, we'll do another.
00:20:22 --> 00:20:26 I think we should do an update episode on that. Because didn't you say you were
00:20:26 --> 00:20:27 looking at starting on HRT again?
00:20:28 --> 00:20:30 I am. I mean, I am looking into that. Yes. Okay.
00:20:32 --> 00:20:36 So we'll circle right back to that. I'm going to check back in with you in two
00:20:36 --> 00:20:39 weeks. And if you have not made an appointment missing, you're going to be in
00:20:39 --> 00:20:42 trouble. I'm not going to answer your calls.
00:20:45 --> 00:20:49 I'll get, I'll find Dave. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Whatever. He won't answer his phone
00:20:49 --> 00:20:51 either. All right. Episode eight.
00:20:52 --> 00:20:56 Looking for mental health resources that actually fit who you are and where you come from?
00:20:57 --> 00:21:01 Then you need to check out the Help Hub. It's not another generic wellness site.
00:21:01 --> 00:21:07 It's a free, inclusive online platform built for real people living real lives.
00:21:07 --> 00:21:14 People managing stress, anxiety, depression, trauma and abuse, grief or suicide loss.
00:21:14 --> 00:21:18 At the Help Hub, you'll find the resources, tools, treatment options and trauma
00:21:18 --> 00:21:23 informed content you need in the moment without having to dig through endless
00:21:23 --> 00:21:24 tabs or start from scratch.
00:21:25 --> 00:21:30 It's your place to land to take a breath and to find exactly what you need when
00:21:30 --> 00:21:35 you need it most visit the helphub.co where the help you need is just a click away.
00:21:42 --> 00:21:48 This one was driven mainly by you and your lived experience.
00:21:49 --> 00:21:54 This was a hard one, surviving estrangement. And again, it didn't necessarily
00:21:54 --> 00:21:59 mean just being estranged from family. It could have been being estranged from,
00:22:00 --> 00:22:02 a friendship, some kind of a relationship.
00:22:03 --> 00:22:07 We talked about that, and that brought us to a totally different kind of grief,
00:22:07 --> 00:22:11 which is the grieving the loss of either a family, in your case,
00:22:11 --> 00:22:14 it's pretty much your whole family, or,
00:22:15 --> 00:22:19 grieving the loss of just a person in your life who's still very much alive,
00:22:19 --> 00:22:21 but very much not a part of your life.
00:22:22 --> 00:22:29 And you gave a really powerful window into what that feels like,
00:22:30 --> 00:22:36 to be the one making that decision, because you really made and stuck to that
00:22:36 --> 00:22:39 decision and what that looks and feels like.
00:22:39 --> 00:22:43 And a lot of people responded to that one as well because it resonated.
00:22:44 --> 00:22:49 Absolutely. I mean, in some ways, grieving the loss of somebody who is still
00:22:49 --> 00:22:51 alive is actually harder.
00:22:52 --> 00:22:55 Yeah. Because death is so final.
00:22:57 --> 00:23:00 You know you'll never see or speak to that person ever again.
00:23:01 --> 00:23:06 But when the other person is still alive there's still the possibility that
00:23:06 --> 00:23:11 they could reach out to you again or if you live in the same place you could see them again,
00:23:11 --> 00:23:15 i'm fortunate enough to have moved across the country so the chances of me seeing
00:23:15 --> 00:23:18 any of my family again is pretty slim but,
00:23:20 --> 00:23:27 it's i have to say it's harder because the there's still that tiny tiny tiny
00:23:27 --> 00:23:32 shred of hope Right They will change That they will become the person That you need them to be,
00:23:33 --> 00:23:38 And it's a constant battle within yourself to remind yourself,
00:23:38 --> 00:23:41 I deserved better out of that relationship.
00:23:42 --> 00:23:47 And continuing to go back over and over and over is absolute insanity.
00:23:47 --> 00:23:51 It's self-destructive. It is. It is very self-destructive. And sometimes I have
00:23:51 --> 00:23:52 to say, listen here, brain.
00:23:54 --> 00:23:58 Don't forget. Don't forget all those things that happened that made you so upset
00:23:58 --> 00:24:02 and that dysregulated you and made you afraid. Yeah.
00:24:02 --> 00:24:06 Yeah, I think for me, when I look back at that episode, I think that,
00:24:07 --> 00:24:15 the bottom line for it was that you can and will miss somebody and still know
00:24:15 --> 00:24:21 that they just cannot be part of your life in the same way, that it's too toxic. It's just too toxic.
00:24:22 --> 00:24:25 And that takes an incredible amount of courage and wisdom on your part.
00:24:26 --> 00:24:32 Yes. And knowing within yourself that I deserve better and reminding yourself that.
00:24:32 --> 00:24:37 In those moments of doubt when you think, I want to text them or I miss them. And it's okay.
00:24:37 --> 00:24:42 Just like with a grieving, a person who has died. It's okay to grieve and to
00:24:42 --> 00:24:44 miss them and still love them.
00:24:45 --> 00:24:48 But just letting go is better for you as a person.
00:24:49 --> 00:24:55 Yeah. Yeah. I think that was a great reminder episode of why you need to kind
00:24:55 --> 00:24:58 of stay the course when you're in that situation.
00:24:58 --> 00:25:02 Because at the end of the day, it's just too toxic. Yeah. And it's damaging.
00:25:02 --> 00:25:06 And, you know, if you're not going to take care of yourself and protect your
00:25:06 --> 00:25:09 own peace, most people aren't going to do it for you.
00:25:09 --> 00:25:12 Right. You are responsible for your own peace, 100%. Mm-hmm.
00:25:14 --> 00:25:19 So from there, we brought on another guest, but not like every single one seemed
00:25:19 --> 00:25:21 more powerful than the last.
00:25:21 --> 00:25:25 This was a conversation that you and I had with our new friend,
00:25:25 --> 00:25:30 Raish McCarney, who shared the story of losing her husband, Sean, to suicide.
00:25:31 --> 00:25:36 She became a single mom of three children overnight.
00:25:37 --> 00:25:42 And you know anytime we talk about suicide loss on this podcast obviously it's
00:25:42 --> 00:25:44 something that hits you and i very very
00:25:44 --> 00:25:49 close to home because between us we have lost eight people we love to suicide
00:25:50 --> 00:25:52 you with your five brothers that you mentioned already,
00:25:53 --> 00:25:58 i lost my cousin my father and one of my best friends so that anyone who's in
00:25:58 --> 00:26:03 that club with us is always a very powerful conversation. And this one really was too.
00:26:04 --> 00:26:09 And, you know, hearing Reshma talk about her husband was just another reminder
00:26:09 --> 00:26:15 in a different way of all the different kinds of layers that are involved in suicide grief.
00:26:16 --> 00:26:21 You know, she found him, she had to navigate telling her children,
00:26:22 --> 00:26:25 which was also an incredibly powerful conversation.
00:26:25 --> 00:26:28 If you go back and you want to listen to that, if you are a parent who is struggling
00:26:29 --> 00:26:33 with the loss of your partner and you have children and you are struggling with
00:26:33 --> 00:26:39 how to handle that situation. She had, would you agree that Reshma's.
00:26:40 --> 00:26:49 This conversation was game-changing as far as a way to explain why her husband
00:26:49 --> 00:26:53 did what her did in a way that there was no blame on her, there was no blame
00:26:53 --> 00:26:55 on her children. It was just beautiful. I don't even want to give it away.
00:26:55 --> 00:27:00 Go back to episode nine of season five and listen.
00:27:00 --> 00:27:05 Because yeah she blew my mind with yeah just her she was so eloquent with her
00:27:05 --> 00:27:09 words and the way that she explained things and,
00:27:10 --> 00:27:15 yeah I mean I'm like please write a book because it was just absolutely amazing
00:27:15 --> 00:27:19 and and I'm so grateful for her to her for for coming on and sharing all of
00:27:19 --> 00:27:21 her wisdom you know she lost I think it was 2022,
00:27:22 --> 00:27:26 that she lost him it's it's just approaching four years now yeah and so you
00:27:27 --> 00:27:31 know she's been living with it and and dealing with it and with her children
00:27:31 --> 00:27:34 and and she's come out on the other side,
00:27:35 --> 00:27:36 so powerful and so strong.
00:27:37 --> 00:27:41 And helping other women helping other other women who have lost,
00:27:42 --> 00:27:46 their partners in similar ways not just a suicide but just grieving,
00:27:47 --> 00:27:51 the the loss of a partner themselves yeah so i mean she she really did give
00:27:51 --> 00:27:57 us the opportunity, I feel, to have a conversation through that lens of losing
00:27:57 --> 00:28:00 a spouse, which you and I really, we don't have that perspective.
00:28:01 --> 00:28:06 And I'm really, really grateful that she brought that to us and to the bigger community.
00:28:07 --> 00:28:12 So from there, we had a conversation with someone who you had been connected
00:28:12 --> 00:28:17 to, who is now someone that I'm thrilled I'm connected to, and that was episode 10.
00:28:17 --> 00:28:21 And this was also something that we had never talked about in quite this way on the pod.
00:28:21 --> 00:28:26 We had Jessica Shaker, who I would consider her, we are, obviously,
00:28:26 --> 00:28:32 she's a mental health advocate, but we're also considering her a very successful TikTok influencer.
00:28:33 --> 00:28:38 And she came on to share with us the perspective of what it's actually like,
00:28:39 --> 00:28:46 to voluntarily commit yourself to an inpatient hospital program of psychiatric
00:28:46 --> 00:28:50 unit because she was in a very very dark place in her life and she,
00:28:51 --> 00:28:58 was suicidal and didn't know what to do didn't know where to go was a wife and
00:28:58 --> 00:29:04 a mom and a teacher and she checked herself in so she gave us that point of view,
00:29:04 --> 00:29:09 from being inside a unit what it was like intake all of it,
00:29:10 --> 00:29:15 yeah and i i myself as somebody who i know i have should have been committed
00:29:15 --> 00:29:19 multiple times throughout my life i needed to know for myself.
00:29:20 --> 00:29:24 That if it happens again in fact i should probably say when,
00:29:25 --> 00:29:30 because it creeps up every now and again but i needed to know what it was actually
00:29:30 --> 00:29:35 like because i have been the stories and the thought process that i have told myself over the years.
00:29:37 --> 00:29:42 I was absolutely terrified and i know why i was terrified because i thought
00:29:42 --> 00:29:47 that i would be trapped in there and yeah very specific childhood trauma which
00:29:47 --> 00:29:48 i won't talk about now but.
00:29:50 --> 00:29:57 If there's any point that I feel trapped physically, psychologically, in any way, I freak out.
00:29:58 --> 00:30:02 And that's what, in my mind, I was going to be trapped in there and I would never get out.
00:30:03 --> 00:30:07 Well, you know what I think was so great about the way Jess explained everything?
00:30:07 --> 00:30:10 Because she did it in such a beautiful, intentional way.
00:30:11 --> 00:30:16 For me, look, the fear that you have is, I think, the fear that anybody has
00:30:16 --> 00:30:22 who is either considering doing the same thing or maybe in a position where
00:30:22 --> 00:30:24 someone is suggesting that they do the same thing.
00:30:26 --> 00:30:29 I think that the conversation like that, she was very, very honest.
00:30:29 --> 00:30:33 And she didn't lie about the fact that it was terrifying, that she definitely
00:30:33 --> 00:30:35 has a little bit of PTSD from it.
00:30:35 --> 00:30:40 But it definitely, I think, stripped away some of the fear and definitely some
00:30:40 --> 00:30:45 of the stigma surrounding psychiatric hospitalization because one of the most
00:30:45 --> 00:30:48 profound things that she said on that episode was,
00:30:49 --> 00:30:55 I definitely have some scars because of that experience, but I would do it again
00:30:55 --> 00:31:01 and again and again if I had to make the same decision again because I am alive,
00:31:01 --> 00:31:03 and thriving because of it.
00:31:03 --> 00:31:09 It saved my life. And so I just thought it was such a necessary and powerful
00:31:10 --> 00:31:15 episode to really give people a true account of what that's like.
00:31:15 --> 00:31:19 And so I was so grateful to her for coming on and being so transparent and vulnerable
00:31:19 --> 00:31:20 and being able to do that.
00:31:21 --> 00:31:28 And speaking of transparent and vulnerable and coming on to share with people
00:31:28 --> 00:31:34 that you can find hope, Beanie Trapani, I love that woman.
00:31:34 --> 00:31:40 She came on, odd, episodes 11 and 12. It was another two-part episode.
00:31:41 --> 00:31:45 And Beanie came on. We all know I love her name. I could say it all day long.
00:31:46 --> 00:31:54 She came on to talk about surviving and escaping a 10-year-long abusive relationship.
00:31:54 --> 00:32:00 And oh my god, if you go on to Beanie's social media, she has a huge following,
00:32:01 --> 00:32:07 on Instagram, she has a big following on TikTok, and she is out there now as
00:32:07 --> 00:32:13 an advocate for women, helping women who are stuck in these abusive relationships
00:32:13 --> 00:32:15 get out of those relationships.
00:32:16 --> 00:32:18 She started filming her abuser.
00:32:19 --> 00:32:24 She started exposing him when he was stalking her, when he continued the abuse,
00:32:24 --> 00:32:26 when he followed her across the country.
00:32:26 --> 00:32:32 It is such an unbelievably harrowing and, I think at the end of the day,
00:32:32 --> 00:32:38 hopeful episode because of what she went through and endured.
00:32:38 --> 00:32:41 Oh, and by the way, in the middle of it all, she was diagnosed with cancer.
00:32:42 --> 00:32:48 So this poor girl was just getting the crap kicked out of her all the way around.
00:32:49 --> 00:32:57 And she managed to get herself out and now has become such a loud and impactful
00:32:57 --> 00:33:01 voice in the domestic abuse space,
00:33:02 --> 00:33:05 helping, I can't even imagine how many women she's helped.
00:33:06 --> 00:33:09 I sat there and listened in complete shock and awe.
00:33:10 --> 00:33:14 And in her social media posts and things, again, like Ali's,
00:33:15 --> 00:33:18 they're just so powerful.
00:33:18 --> 00:33:22 And these conversations and the awareness in that is amazing.
00:33:23 --> 00:33:28 Doing so much good in the world you know i think back over the generations of
00:33:28 --> 00:33:32 women who were stuck because they didn't have a way out they didn't have a lifeline,
00:33:32 --> 00:33:35 and beanie you know she got,
00:33:35 --> 00:33:42 a lifeline through a stranger helped her get out and it's just absolutely amazing
00:33:42 --> 00:33:44 and i'm so grateful to these women who,
00:33:44 --> 00:33:48 you know men and women who are are doing the hard work and helping these people
00:33:48 --> 00:33:52 get out of these awful situations yeah yeah yeah it was one of my favorite things
00:33:52 --> 00:33:58 about our conversation with her is that her story wasn't only about the getting out it was about,
00:34:00 --> 00:34:03 what she built for herself and what she's giving to others,
00:34:04 --> 00:34:09 after she got out so that to me is just like a full circle story and and you mentioned,
00:34:09 --> 00:34:14 this is a good segue you mentioned the men and women who have come on this podcast
00:34:14 --> 00:34:18 and who are out in the world doing remarkable things with their own lived experience
00:34:18 --> 00:34:24 that is episode 13 our friend wes bruns who also,
00:34:24 --> 00:34:26 god we're hearing all these just,
00:34:27 --> 00:34:32 impossible stories on the pod the more we speak to people and wes's story,
00:34:33 --> 00:34:39 is in that category of holy shit if we had a category that would be it.
00:34:40 --> 00:34:44 Wes lost, what was it, four of his family members?
00:34:44 --> 00:34:48 Two brothers and his mom and stepdad, basically his dad.
00:34:49 --> 00:34:55 To carbon monoxide poisoning. And Wes was in the house at the time.
00:34:55 --> 00:34:59 Everybody was having kind of like a family get together for Christmas, for the holidays.
00:34:59 --> 00:35:03 And he was affected by it to the point where he was in a coma.
00:35:03 --> 00:35:06 It was five days, right? I think he was in a coma. Five, seven days,
00:35:06 --> 00:35:07 yeah. Something like that.
00:35:08 --> 00:35:15 And when he woke up, he woke up to learn that he had lost four of the family
00:35:15 --> 00:35:20 members who were in that house with him celebrating Christmas and just having
00:35:20 --> 00:35:21 a family reunion get together.
00:35:21 --> 00:35:26 And what Wes has done with his story,
00:35:26 --> 00:35:32 coming on podcasts like ours and others, and being kind of,
00:35:33 --> 00:35:39 the poster boy for carbon monoxide poisoning and awareness and safety,
00:35:39 --> 00:35:42 and has a book that is coming out this summer,
00:35:43 --> 00:35:46 that we're so excited to help him promote on the podcast.
00:35:46 --> 00:35:54 And it was just a remarkable story of survival in such a different way than
00:35:54 --> 00:35:55 we're used to talking about it.
00:35:56 --> 00:36:02 And it was interesting, you know, because I've had where I lost four family
00:36:02 --> 00:36:05 members over the course of five months and how gut-wrenching that was.
00:36:05 --> 00:36:09 And so for him to have lost four family members on the same night.
00:36:11 --> 00:36:14 That conversation really just, it struck me.
00:36:15 --> 00:36:19 And I, you know, him, I was able to ask him some very powerful questions and,
00:36:20 --> 00:36:23 that helped me with dealing with some of my grief. Because as you know,
00:36:23 --> 00:36:27 when you're dealing with the loss of any family member or friend or loved one,
00:36:27 --> 00:36:30 I should say, you're carrying that grief forever.
00:36:31 --> 00:36:37 And not that it gets smaller, but it gets, you get stronger in carrying it.
00:36:37 --> 00:36:39 It's, it's like with anything you kind of get used to carrying it.
00:36:39 --> 00:36:41 So it doesn't feel so big.
00:36:42 --> 00:36:48 And so, and it doesn't feel so far. And, and Wes, the way he explained his story.
00:36:48 --> 00:36:53 And I mean, And under normal circumstances, that could have derailed him completely.
00:36:54 --> 00:37:00 But he turned his life around and become a coach and all these amazing,
00:37:00 --> 00:37:02 powerful things that he shared about his wife and his children.
00:37:02 --> 00:37:08 And it was just so beautiful to hear him talk about what could have derailed
00:37:08 --> 00:37:12 him for the rest of his life. He actually turned it into something beautiful.
00:37:13 --> 00:37:18 And I'm just so, so happy that you found him. and we had him on the podcast
00:37:18 --> 00:37:20 and were able to get his story out there.
00:37:21 --> 00:37:28 Yeah, yeah, he's a great, great human being. And, you know, like everyone who's come on...
00:37:29 --> 00:37:34 Has been just so incredibly vulnerable in sharing what they carry through life.
00:37:34 --> 00:37:39 So that was definitely an episode worth listening to, if you haven't heard it already.
00:37:40 --> 00:37:45 And then, all of a sudden, we're into last week. And last week was episode 14.
00:37:45 --> 00:37:50 And it was kind of a continuation in a way of the very first conversation we
00:37:50 --> 00:37:53 had this season, which was the lies that we tell ourselves that we're all okay,
00:37:53 --> 00:37:55 okay, okay, and we don't say the truth.
00:37:56 --> 00:38:00 This was a conversation about kind of what happens after we confront someone
00:38:01 --> 00:38:03 or admit that we're not okay.
00:38:04 --> 00:38:08 What does the conversation look like after that? How can we have a conversation
00:38:08 --> 00:38:10 beyond that that saves a life?
00:38:10 --> 00:38:15 And I loved that conversation. I think it was the right time to have that conversation
00:38:15 --> 00:38:16 right before the recap because it
00:38:16 --> 00:38:22 brings so many themes from this season together, at least to me, it did.
00:38:22 --> 00:38:29 You know, we spend so much time worrying about saying the wrong thing to someone
00:38:29 --> 00:38:33 if they're in trouble or if they just need support or if they're grieving.
00:38:34 --> 00:38:40 And that episode was a really good reminder that, you know, it isn't always
00:38:40 --> 00:38:42 even so much about what you say.
00:38:43 --> 00:38:48 It's that you're just there. You're there to be present, to,
00:38:48 --> 00:38:54 like you always like to say, witness that person's grief or struggle or crisis or whatever it is.
00:38:55 --> 00:39:01 And we talked a lot about how the fear of being transparent and open and really,
00:39:01 --> 00:39:04 really honest when we answer the I'm fine question.
00:39:05 --> 00:39:09 That fear keeps us oftentimes from getting the help we need.
00:39:10 --> 00:39:18 And it also keeps people who want to help fearful of asking the harder questions
00:39:18 --> 00:39:20 because we don't know what to do with the answers.
00:39:20 --> 00:39:28 And so we really dug into that whole piece of what comes after you find out how someone really is.
00:39:28 --> 00:39:33 How can you then have a conversation with someone when you kind of really know
00:39:33 --> 00:39:35 what they're dealing with?
00:39:35 --> 00:39:39 How do you have a conversation that really serves them and gets them to a place
00:39:39 --> 00:39:43 of getting the help or getting the support or getting the meds or getting the
00:39:43 --> 00:39:45 treatment or whatever it is that they need?
00:39:45 --> 00:39:51 How do you help them then get, like, bridge that gap to a place of getting what they need?
00:39:51 --> 00:39:55 And I just loved that that was kind of the way that we brought the whole season
00:39:55 --> 00:39:59 back around and were able to,
00:39:59 --> 00:40:04 maybe kind of have a second part to that episode one in the last episode.
00:40:04 --> 00:40:07 So I really, I loved that.
00:40:08 --> 00:40:13 It just spoke to me about the power of having the hard but necessary conversations
00:40:13 --> 00:40:17 and that we all need to be more conscious of having them as often as we can.
00:40:17 --> 00:40:22 And just a little reminder that you can't ever give somebody the thought of being suicidal.
00:40:23 --> 00:40:26 They're already thinking about it. Whether or not you're asking about it is
00:40:26 --> 00:40:28 not going to give them that idea.
00:40:28 --> 00:40:33 So the important thing is to ask, you know, what feels heaviest for you today?
00:40:33 --> 00:40:38 Or, you know, just simply, I'm here. I'm really glad you told me.
00:40:38 --> 00:40:41 Stay calm. Don't panic. Don't lecture.
00:40:42 --> 00:40:47 Don't argue. Just listen. or even just simply being present with them,
00:40:47 --> 00:40:50 holding them, letting them know they're not alone.
00:40:53 --> 00:40:56 And I love that that's where we kind of officially ended the season.
00:40:56 --> 00:41:02 And now here we are, season five, episode 15.
00:41:02 --> 00:41:07 That is a wrap. We are done, but we're going to do what we always do.
00:41:08 --> 00:41:11 You and I, as much as we were always like, oh, God, I want to go to the beach.
00:41:11 --> 00:41:12 I want to take a vacation.
00:41:12 --> 00:41:17 We don't do that with this podcast. We just want to keep the momentum going.
00:41:17 --> 00:41:20 We are not taking a break between season five and season six.
00:41:20 --> 00:41:24 We are diving directly into season six next week.
00:41:24 --> 00:41:32 We are building our calendar. We have got some really amazing humans coming on in season six.
00:41:34 --> 00:41:41 I just personally want to thank everyone who joined us, who shared their story,
00:41:41 --> 00:41:46 who shared their type of survival, who was open and vulnerable.
00:41:46 --> 00:41:50 It matters so much to us to hear your perspective. We are so grateful to every
00:41:50 --> 00:41:54 single person who took time out of their life to come and chat with us.
00:41:54 --> 00:41:57 It takes a lot of courage to sit down in front of a microphone and kind of bare
00:41:57 --> 00:42:01 your soul and talk about the hardest things that you've ever had to deal with.
00:42:01 --> 00:42:03 So we do not take that lightly. If you've been on this podcast,
00:42:03 --> 00:42:05 you know how seriously we take that.
00:42:05 --> 00:42:10 And we really, really appreciate it. So Ali, Reshma, Beanie,
00:42:10 --> 00:42:12 Wes, Jessica, we appreciate you.
00:42:13 --> 00:42:18 And we will be back. You know, The Survivors has never ever,
00:42:18 --> 00:42:23 was never the intention for it to just be about you and I. We've always wanted to open a conversation.
00:42:23 --> 00:42:28 We have done that now and we're gonna continue opening it further and wider.
00:42:28 --> 00:42:35 So thanks to everyone, especially you, my beautiful little human in your little square.
00:42:37 --> 00:42:43 I love you a lot. You know how much I do love you and how I feel about you being here to do this with me.
00:42:43 --> 00:42:47 And I just appreciate you every time we click record.
00:42:47 --> 00:42:51 You're going to make me cry. No, I'm not. You're fine. You are.
00:42:51 --> 00:42:58 So what you guys deserve to know is that Lisa is, she's like a magical fairy godmother, really.
00:42:58 --> 00:43:03 Like what she's behind the scenes, okay? So she doesn't let me gush about her
00:43:03 --> 00:43:07 a whole lot. So I'm going to take a... I'm going to shut off your microphone.
00:43:08 --> 00:43:12 Okay, first of all, I want you guys to know, we hit an amazing milestone this season.
00:43:13 --> 00:43:20 So not only are we all in all 50 states, but we are in now 90 plus countries.
00:43:20 --> 00:43:24 Can you believe that? And we could not have done that with all of you,
00:43:24 --> 00:43:29 our listeners, who share our stories, or share our podcast, who share our clips, whatever.
00:43:30 --> 00:43:34 And getting these episodes out there, we cannot thank you enough.
00:43:34 --> 00:43:40 And we're growing and we just are so very blessed to be able to do this and
00:43:40 --> 00:43:44 so if we could just ask one small thing of you beyond what you already do which
00:43:44 --> 00:43:48 is listening if you whatever platform is that you listen to us on,
00:43:49 --> 00:43:54 if you could give us a rating or a review or whatever it really helps our stats
00:43:54 --> 00:43:57 you know we live in a world where stats are important
00:43:57 --> 00:44:00 but that would really tremendously help us even if you could just leave a short
00:44:00 --> 00:44:05 quick little review that would help us a lot but I want to say one thing.
00:44:05 --> 00:44:07 I don't want to interrupt you, but I don't want to forget to say this in the
00:44:07 --> 00:44:08 context of what you just said.
00:44:09 --> 00:44:13 The stats are important, but not for the reason why you may think if you're listening.
00:44:14 --> 00:44:19 The stats are only important to us because it means it puts the podcast on more
00:44:19 --> 00:44:21 people's radar, period.
00:44:22 --> 00:44:28 We don't care about anything else in regard to stats and downloads and all of
00:44:28 --> 00:44:33 those things. We care because it elevates our podcast to a place where more
00:44:33 --> 00:44:35 people get to see it, plain and simple. That's all. Yep.
00:44:36 --> 00:44:41 It's not about the numbers. It is about getting the information to the people who need it.
00:44:42 --> 00:44:46 So thank you for sharing that. So I just want to tell Miss Lisa how much I love
00:44:46 --> 00:44:51 her and I adore her. And what you guys also might not know is we've never actually met in person.
00:44:52 --> 00:44:56 We've known each other. I think we're coming up on almost a year now, I think.
00:44:57 --> 00:45:00 And that's what I, you know, I love in the beginning of this episode,
00:45:00 --> 00:45:04 it feels like we just got started, but yet we've known each other a lifetime.
00:45:04 --> 00:45:09 And we're going to meet eventually, you know, we're just, I'm a busy mom of
00:45:09 --> 00:45:15 two and she's got 1, 50, 11 things going on in her life that she's just
00:45:15 --> 00:45:19 amazing mental health advocate out there just doing all the amazing things.
00:45:19 --> 00:45:21 I love seeing her posts on what she's doing out there.
00:45:22 --> 00:45:25 And what you guys don't know is we oftentimes, when we're not recording,
00:45:25 --> 00:45:28 her and I will just sit here and chat sometimes for an hour.
00:45:29 --> 00:45:35 And it's just, when you talk about a soul connection that her and i have it's,
00:45:35 --> 00:45:40 definitely there and you know it might have taken me 40 years to find her,
00:45:40 --> 00:45:45 but i'm so incredibly grateful that i did and thank you joe for putting us together
00:45:45 --> 00:45:49 yeah that's right our friend joe massa from my suicide story shout out to joe
00:45:49 --> 00:45:54 for shipping us as being two people who needed to to find each other and do
00:45:54 --> 00:45:55 something special together so joe
00:45:55 --> 00:45:58 we're doing exactly what you said and we're doing something special together
00:45:58 --> 00:45:59 and it's all thanks to you.
00:45:59 --> 00:46:06 So if you are still here at the 45 minute mark, which is pretty much where we
00:46:06 --> 00:46:08 are, thanks for hanging out. Thanks for hanging in.
00:46:09 --> 00:46:13 Thanks for listening, supporting, sharing, and just being a part of the community.
00:46:14 --> 00:46:15 We love and appreciate you.
00:46:15 --> 00:46:18 Nosh, I love you, and I'll see you right back here next week.
00:46:18 --> 00:46:23 We will be back with Season 6 of The Survivors. Talk soon.
00:46:25 --> 00:46:29 Thanks so much for listening and for being part of The Survivors community.
00:46:29 --> 00:46:33 No matter where you are in your story, you're not alone, and you're definitely
00:46:33 --> 00:46:37 not broken. Healing takes time, and it looks different for everyone.
00:46:38 --> 00:46:42 The fact that you're still here and still trying means you're already doing the hard work.
00:46:43 --> 00:46:47 If something in today's conversation resonated with you, please share it with
00:46:47 --> 00:46:48 someone who might need to hear it too.
00:46:49 --> 00:46:53 That's how we keep these conversations going and remind each other that there's always hope.
00:46:54 --> 00:46:57 And if you or someone you know is struggling, please remember,
00:46:57 --> 00:46:58 help is always out there.
00:46:58 --> 00:47:03 You can call or text 988 anytime to reach a trained crisis counselor like me.
00:47:03 --> 00:47:07 And for more mental health resources, tools, treatment options,
00:47:07 --> 00:47:10 and content to support your mental health, visit thehelphub.co.
00:47:11 --> 00:47:14 We're so grateful you're part of the Survivors family, and we'll be back next
00:47:14 --> 00:47:18 week with another honest conversation about life after the hardest things.
00:47:18 --> 00:47:23 Until then, take care of yourself and your people, and keep surviving.