*WARNING: This podcast mentions suicide, sexual abuse & trauma and may be triggering.
Episode Summary
In this episode, Natasha shares her journey from severe obesity to losing over 100 pounds, examining how childhood trauma, medications, stress, and coping behaviors shaped her body and mental health.
Lisa & Natasha discuss treatment options (including GLP‑1 medications), the role of therapy and lifestyle changes, and practical, compassionate steps toward healing and resilience.
Episode Sponsored by The HelpHUB™
Struggling with your mental health? Feeling lost, overwhelmed, or just alone? Well, you're not. Welcome to The HelpHUB™—your online destination for mental health resources, treatment options, content, and tools to help meet you exactly where you are in the moment. Visit TheHelpHUB.co to get started.
Takeaways
- Impact of childhood trauma on weight
- The role of medication in weight changes
- Mental health and self-compassion during weight loss
- Physical and emotional transformation after weight loss
- The importance of small, sustainable changes
Chapters
00:00 Surviving Trauma and Transformation 03:05 The Weight of Obesity and Self-Image 05:58 Childhood Trauma and Its Impact on Weight 08:56 Coping Mechanisms: Food and Medication 12:02 The Journey to Weight Loss and Mental Health 14:50 Navigating Relationships and Food Choices 18:11 Navigating Medication Withdrawal and Emotional Turmoil 21:38 Understanding Childhood Trauma and Its Impact 25:17 he Role of Stress in Weight Management 29:17 Exploring GLP-1 and Weight Loss Journey 33:15 Physical Transformation and Self-Acceptance 34:38 Empowerment and Taking Control of HealthMental Health Resources
- Dr. Daniel Amon - Brain Health Expert
- GLP-1 Medications (e.g., Wegovy, Ozempic)
- If you or someone you know is struggling, please call 988 for help.
- The Survivors Podcast Website – https://thesurvivors.net/
- The HelpHUB™ – Mental health resources, tools, and support networks – https://www.thehelphub.co/
- National Domestic Violence Hotline – Call 1-800-799-SAFE (7223)
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See you next week! In the meantime, keep surviving.
00:00:00 --> 00:00:04 Hey friends, before we dive into this week's episode, just a heads up.
00:00:04 --> 00:00:08 Our podcast talks about suicide, sexual abuse, and other trauma,
00:00:08 --> 00:00:12 and some of what you hear may be triggering. So please listen with care.
00:00:13 --> 00:00:18 This is The Survivors, real stories, raw conversations, and the truth about
00:00:18 --> 00:00:21 what it means to keep going after the hardest things.
00:00:21 --> 00:00:24 We're so glad you're here. Let's keep surviving together.
00:00:27 --> 00:00:30 So you and I have wanted to talk about this for a little while.
00:00:31 --> 00:00:36 And we have talked about it a lot offline, but today we're bringing it online. And today's the day.
00:00:37 --> 00:00:42 You have survived a lot in your life. That's a massive understatement.
00:00:42 --> 00:00:46 An awful lot. You've survived the suicides of five of your brothers,
00:00:47 --> 00:00:51 three of your own attempts, sexual abuse, cult life, domestic abuse.
00:00:51 --> 00:00:54 Like, you've survived it all.
00:00:55 --> 00:00:59 And we've talked a lot about all of those things and all those traumas over
00:00:59 --> 00:01:01 the last two seasons or season and a half.
00:01:01 --> 00:01:06 But what we've never actually talked about is something else that you survived,
00:01:06 --> 00:01:10 which is you survived obesity.
00:01:10 --> 00:01:13 I mean, there's only one way to say it. That's pretty fair to say that.
00:01:13 --> 00:01:22 And you've lost over 100 pounds, which is such an unbelievable accomplishment.
00:01:22 --> 00:01:25 So today, I hope you're smiling.
00:01:25 --> 00:01:28 You better smile because it's amazing. It makes me smile.
00:01:28 --> 00:01:35 So, today's a conversation about transformation and a different kind of survival,
00:01:35 --> 00:01:40 but something that so, so many people struggle with in so many different ways.
00:01:40 --> 00:01:42 It's not just the people who are struggling to lose 100 pounds.
00:01:43 --> 00:01:46 It could be 50 or 20 or 10. Yeah.
00:01:46 --> 00:01:53 We're talking about it in terms of surviving that kind of trauma.
00:01:54 --> 00:01:59 Would you consider it to have been traumatic for you, to have been whatever
00:01:59 --> 00:02:03 the size was that you were when you started losing weight?
00:02:04 --> 00:02:09 So the highest I ever got was about 320, and I stopped weighing after that.
00:02:09 --> 00:02:13 I know I got heavier, but I don't know how heavy I got.
00:02:13 --> 00:02:16 I would imagine somewhere in the 340 range. yeah
00:02:16 --> 00:02:20 and yes it was because people treated me differently i and
00:02:20 --> 00:02:23 many people that have lost weight talk about how they
00:02:23 --> 00:02:26 get treated differently after they
00:02:26 --> 00:02:29 lose weight and yes it was i it's it
00:02:29 --> 00:02:36 was hard absolutely just the the overall carrying that much weight is exhausting
00:02:36 --> 00:02:42 emotionally physically looking in the mirror is hard and then you start to beat
00:02:42 --> 00:02:47 yourself up and just like the self-image is really awful in that situation.
00:02:48 --> 00:02:52 And I have looked back for like before and after photos.
00:02:52 --> 00:02:57 There are not many. I did not take very many pictures of my full body when I
00:02:57 --> 00:03:01 was that heavy because I didn't want to see it. I didn't want to be reminded of it.
00:03:02 --> 00:03:08 Yeah. And I can imagine that that's a pretty consistent practice from anybody
00:03:08 --> 00:03:11 who doesn't feel good in their own skin,
00:03:11 --> 00:03:18 And whether it be someone who's overweight or someone who has some other kind
00:03:18 --> 00:03:20 of challenge that's physical,
00:03:21 --> 00:03:24 I imagine that's a pretty normal way to feel it.
00:03:25 --> 00:03:29 Absolutely. And I would say I've always been what's considered,
00:03:29 --> 00:03:30 quote unquote, bigger boned.
00:03:31 --> 00:03:36 But I would say that I just over the course of it was,
00:03:36 --> 00:03:41 you know, I had mentioned previously in an episode that I had developed a thyroid
00:03:41 --> 00:03:46 disorder at 14, 15 when I started having the flashbacks about being sexually
00:03:46 --> 00:03:47 abused by my older brother.
00:03:47 --> 00:03:52 And it seemed about that time, not too long after that, you know,
00:03:52 --> 00:03:54 I did get my thyroid under control.
00:03:55 --> 00:04:01 But it seemed like after that, it was just a slow, steady weight gain that happened
00:04:01 --> 00:04:05 over the course of a decade or more.
00:04:05 --> 00:04:08 And I just didn't, people are like, how did you not know?
00:04:09 --> 00:04:14 And when it's slow. Well, you knew. Right, I did. But people are like,
00:04:14 --> 00:04:15 how could you let that happen?
00:04:16 --> 00:04:20 You know, just various things like that. my mom was not very kind about it.
00:04:20 --> 00:04:25 And I just, it happened so slowly that you're just one day you look in the mirror
00:04:25 --> 00:04:29 and you're like, oh my Lord, or you see a picture of yourself and oh my God,
00:04:29 --> 00:04:30 do I really look like that?
00:04:30 --> 00:04:34 I had that happen a lot where I'd look at pictures of myself and I was, cause it was weird.
00:04:34 --> 00:04:38 It was a little bit of body dysmorphia where I, when I looked in the mirror,
00:04:38 --> 00:04:41 I didn't see that. But when I would look at a picture, I was like,
00:04:42 --> 00:04:45 That is what I look like, but I don't see that in the mirror.
00:04:45 --> 00:04:49 It's very strange to me. Same thing happens now, 100-pound weight loss.
00:04:49 --> 00:04:53 I still have trouble shopping for clothes because I still think I'm that big
00:04:53 --> 00:04:55 or human, and I keep buying clothes that are too big.
00:04:56 --> 00:04:58 Come home, try them on, and I'm like, I have to go down a size.
00:04:59 --> 00:05:00 Well, that's a good problem to have.
00:05:01 --> 00:05:07 It is very, very strange. You know, and I've looked into it a lot about, you know, why?
00:05:07 --> 00:05:13 Why did I struggle with my weight? And I have some stats here that I want to
00:05:13 --> 00:05:15 share with you about childhood trauma.
00:05:16 --> 00:05:22 So according to a study, people that have experienced adverse childhood trauma
00:05:22 --> 00:05:31 are two to three times more likely to experience obesity in their lifetime than the average human.
00:05:31 --> 00:05:35 Yeah, that doesn't surprise me. Yeah, two to three times more likely.
00:05:35 --> 00:05:40 And then with each additional trauma, that adds an additional 20 to 30%.
00:05:41 --> 00:05:46 Well, I rattled off all of your previous trauma, and I'm not making light of it.
00:05:46 --> 00:05:49 I'm not laughing, even though we're both kind of smiling because you know where I'm going with this.
00:05:49 --> 00:05:53 Like, you should literally weigh 10 pounds. i know
00:05:53 --> 00:05:56 absolutely i had i i when i
00:05:56 --> 00:05:59 started looking up the stats i was like okay this
00:05:59 --> 00:06:03 is making some sense you know it's as as
00:06:03 --> 00:06:06 each trauma happens your risk goes higher and higher
00:06:06 --> 00:06:11 and higher and it makes perfect sense absolute perfect sense as to why i got
00:06:11 --> 00:06:17 to be you know and then covid happened and i got on an antidepressant that just
00:06:17 --> 00:06:22 literally turned off my full button And everybody was going through a really
00:06:22 --> 00:06:23 hard time, obviously, during 2020.
00:06:24 --> 00:06:29 And so I got on a stronger antidepressant to deal with all of that.
00:06:29 --> 00:06:33 And I just ate and ate and ate and ate.
00:06:33 --> 00:06:38 And I had zero energy. I became an absolute zombie.
00:06:38 --> 00:06:44 If I managed to get a load of laundry done in a day, I was happy about it. Yeah.
00:06:44 --> 00:06:49 Well, I mean, the truth is most of the time what's happening on the outside
00:06:49 --> 00:06:54 is just a reflection of what we're trying to survive on the inside.
00:06:54 --> 00:06:58 And you're trying at that time in your life to survive all of these incredible losses.
00:06:58 --> 00:07:04 You know, your dad, your brothers, your own attempts, your, you know,
00:07:05 --> 00:07:10 trying to navigate COVID at home with kids and a family and all those moving parts.
00:07:10 --> 00:07:15 And that's a lot. And that's enough to throw anybody into a tailspin.
00:07:15 --> 00:07:21 I'm sure if you looked at what the alcoholism or drug abuse statistics during
00:07:21 --> 00:07:25 that finite period of time were, I'm sure those all skyrocketed.
00:07:25 --> 00:07:28 I know that suicide attempts and mental illness skyrocketed.
00:07:28 --> 00:07:30 So, you know, it all goes hand in hand.
00:07:31 --> 00:07:36 Absolutely. And I know that people that have like a binge eating disorder,
00:07:36 --> 00:07:44 the stats on that is 50% to 70% of individuals with childhood trauma will have
00:07:44 --> 00:07:45 a binge eating disorder.
00:07:45 --> 00:07:52 I don't think I actually like binge eat, but I would just, I don't know.
00:07:52 --> 00:07:57 I overate for sure. I do know that. I didn't ever feel like I was binge eating
00:07:57 --> 00:08:00 or anything. Well, it's a coping mechanism.
00:08:00 --> 00:08:02 And that's the thing about eating unhealthy.
00:08:02 --> 00:08:08 When we're eating unhealthy, all the sugar, all the salt, all the carbs,
00:08:08 --> 00:08:15 all the unhealthy things that we're eating are tricking our brain into wanting
00:08:15 --> 00:08:17 just more and more and more and more of those things.
00:08:17 --> 00:08:21 But they deplete our energy and our resources and our muscle capacity,
00:08:21 --> 00:08:23 and they change our physiology.
00:08:24 --> 00:08:35 I mean, 500 calories of fruit is not at all something you can compare to 500
00:08:35 --> 00:08:38 calories of snack food and crap.
00:08:39 --> 00:08:46 It's not. The calorie count may be the same, but what you're talking about in terms of of.
00:08:46 --> 00:08:51 What those calories are made up of and what they do for your body,
00:08:51 --> 00:08:53 they react totally differently in our body.
00:08:54 --> 00:08:57 So it's no wonder that you didn't feel full because you're eating all the stuff
00:08:57 --> 00:08:59 that's designed to keep you wanting more of the same stuff.
00:08:59 --> 00:09:01 Yeah. And I was on a number of
00:09:01 --> 00:09:04 different medications, one of which I was taking Ambien to help me sleep.
00:09:05 --> 00:09:11 And one of the side effects is Ambien is I would get what's called nighttime munchies.
00:09:11 --> 00:09:14 I have a story for you. Boy, way do I have a tangent for you.
00:09:15 --> 00:09:15 Go ahead. I'll tell you after.
00:09:16 --> 00:09:22 And I would wake up in the morning and I would see bags of empty chips or snacks
00:09:22 --> 00:09:27 on the side of my bed and have absolutely no recollection of eating that.
00:09:27 --> 00:09:31 I feel so close to you right now. You have no idea. Like, I want to hug you so badly right now.
00:09:31 --> 00:09:34 When Dave listens to this episode,
00:09:34 --> 00:09:40 he is going to die because I was on Ambien for 10 years. So was I.
00:09:41 --> 00:09:48 10 years for sleep. It was the most absolutely miserable experience of my life.
00:09:48 --> 00:09:53 So there were a few things that I dealt with relating to Ambien.
00:09:53 --> 00:09:56 And what you're talking about with food is only one part of it.
00:09:56 --> 00:10:01 For me, it created some kind of a crazy chain reaction in my body that whenever
00:10:01 --> 00:10:04 I would sweat, I know this is going to be way too much information for anybody
00:10:04 --> 00:10:06 to need to listen to right now, but I'm going to say it anyway,
00:10:06 --> 00:10:07 because we talk about everything on this podcast.
00:10:08 --> 00:10:14 I was a big runner at the time and was constantly at the gym, constantly running.
00:10:14 --> 00:10:18 So I'm constantly sweating all the time. It was like I became allergic to my own sweat.
00:10:18 --> 00:10:22 So I would have, no joke, I swear to God, I'm going to have to show you pictures
00:10:22 --> 00:10:27 of what this looked like, because there were times when I had to actually photograph
00:10:27 --> 00:10:29 these episodes to show to a doctor.
00:10:29 --> 00:10:35 I would, around my waistband, around where your bra, your sports bra fits you,
00:10:35 --> 00:10:40 I would have the most uncontrollable, savage,
00:10:40 --> 00:10:45 heat, like filled with heat and prickly, itchy rash.
00:10:46 --> 00:10:49 On any part of my body that was coming in contact with my own sweat.
00:10:50 --> 00:10:55 And that lasted for 10 years. I could be out in the garden gardening and I would break out.
00:10:55 --> 00:10:58 I could be out for a run, out for a walk. I could be sitting at someone's wedding
00:10:58 --> 00:11:01 and it's a, you know, the air conditioning is not too strong.
00:11:01 --> 00:11:04 And all of a sudden I've got this massive rash.
00:11:05 --> 00:11:09 The other part of it was I would always have like a little,
00:11:10 --> 00:11:14 you know, like a bowl of fruit at night in bed or, you know,
00:11:14 --> 00:11:15 we'd have maybe some popcorn,
00:11:16 --> 00:11:21 I would come, I would get up in the morning and I would have a bowl of something
00:11:21 --> 00:11:27 and have zero memory, zero memory of going and getting it or of eating it.
00:11:27 --> 00:11:29 And this happened all the time.
00:11:30 --> 00:11:33 Hey, it's Lisa Sugarman, co-host of the Survivors and founder of the Help Hub.
00:11:34 --> 00:11:38 If you're listening right now and you're not okay, if you're feeling overwhelmed,
00:11:39 --> 00:11:43 stuck, or like you're carrying more than you can handle, please know you don't
00:11:43 --> 00:11:44 have to go through it alone.
00:11:44 --> 00:11:51 You can call or text 988 or chat online at 988lifeline.org to connect with trained
00:11:51 --> 00:11:55 counselors like me who are there to listen and support you in the moment.
00:11:55 --> 00:12:00 Reaching out is a great first step and you owe it to yourself because your life
00:12:00 --> 00:12:05 matters, your story matters, and help is always just three numbers away.
00:12:08 --> 00:12:12 And there's another thing that is not talked about either is an intimate time
00:12:12 --> 00:12:15 with your spouse. And then you're like, no, thanks.
00:12:16 --> 00:12:18 No, like, I didn't remember.
00:12:21 --> 00:12:25 Oh, really? Oh, OK. No, for real. I'd wake up, you know, the next morning,
00:12:26 --> 00:12:27 be having my coffee or whatever.
00:12:27 --> 00:12:31 And I'd get a little flash. And I was like, so it's kind of a joke with George
00:12:31 --> 00:12:34 and I now. And I walk up. I'm like, did we?
00:12:35 --> 00:12:42 And he's like, yeah. Yeah. Well, go George. I didn't know that that was a side effect.
00:12:42 --> 00:12:48 I thought you were going to say sleep shopping, which is what a ton of people who used Ambien.
00:12:48 --> 00:12:51 There were all these chat groups. I found out all this crazy information when
00:12:51 --> 00:12:55 I started looking it all up, but we're getting completely off topic.
00:12:55 --> 00:12:57 But I think that this was a really funny tangent because it's so,
00:12:58 --> 00:13:01 I mean, it's so true and it relates to what you're saying because it's all about,
00:13:01 --> 00:13:03 you know, about eating and consumption.
00:13:03 --> 00:13:05 But all right, so let's go back a second.
00:13:05 --> 00:13:09 Let's go back before your weight loss. Can we do that for a second?
00:13:10 --> 00:13:15 What was life feeling like for you around, like emotionally,
00:13:16 --> 00:13:20 mentally, like in the time before you really started to gain weight?
00:13:20 --> 00:13:25 Like, do you remember when things kind of started to shift? Was there an event?
00:13:25 --> 00:13:30 But when I got really heavy? When you like really started to gain weight and
00:13:30 --> 00:13:31 noticed that you gained weight.
00:13:32 --> 00:13:35 It was over the course of a few years and I
00:13:35 --> 00:13:37 would see again pictures but we spent a lot of time at the
00:13:37 --> 00:13:40 beach and you know there were pictures and
00:13:40 --> 00:13:43 stuff like that and I was just in denial and
00:13:43 --> 00:13:50 kept having to buy bigger and bigger clothes and you know and then it was just
00:13:50 --> 00:13:54 a matter of survival where I was just like I did I got got to the point where
00:13:54 --> 00:13:58 I just didn't care yeah what were you going through like emotionally at that
00:13:58 --> 00:14:01 time that may have triggered it like would you think that there was it?
00:14:02 --> 00:14:08 Trigger no it was just a slow steady i had started i had started i got on lexapro
00:14:08 --> 00:14:13 when i was dominic was a baby because i had some postpartum depression i was
00:14:13 --> 00:14:14 on that for a number of years.
00:14:15 --> 00:14:20 And then again with covid got on paxil and that one just pushed me up over 300
00:14:20 --> 00:14:28 pounds rapidly within nine months or so and i was that's when i was like i can't
00:14:28 --> 00:14:30 do this i saw a picture of me in 2021,
00:14:31 --> 00:14:34 one um for my birthday and i just was like
00:14:34 --> 00:14:37 oh my lord yeah i can't do
00:14:37 --> 00:14:40 this anymore and so i chose to
00:14:40 --> 00:14:46 wean off of the paxil which was one of the you know me personally the hardest
00:14:46 --> 00:14:49 one of the hardest things i've ever done i i've later found out i probably should
00:14:49 --> 00:14:56 have gone to a clinic where they get you a kind of like a detox yeah detox yeah
00:14:56 --> 00:14:59 i actually speaking about ambien i just went cold turkey.
00:15:00 --> 00:15:03 Complete cold turkey. Yeah, you're not supposed to do that. You're not supposed to do that.
00:15:04 --> 00:15:09 But what I will say is that it was unbelievable almost immediately.
00:15:09 --> 00:15:16 Almost, I would say within a week, I did not have a single issue having a rash.
00:15:17 --> 00:15:22 It changed my life. I mean, those were so debilitating. That was the worst part of it for me.
00:15:23 --> 00:15:29 And it was all gone immediately. Did you get on Ambien after you found out about your dad's suicide?
00:15:29 --> 00:15:33 Is that why you started taking it? No, I didn't. I have just always been a historically
00:15:33 --> 00:15:35 terrible sleeper, and it's not for lack of trying.
00:15:35 --> 00:15:42 I just have that extra chromosome in my body that just can function fairly well
00:15:42 --> 00:15:44 on two, three hours of sleep.
00:15:44 --> 00:15:47 So it doesn't matter what time I go to bed. It doesn't matter what I take.
00:15:47 --> 00:15:51 It doesn't matter, like, if I take a gummy, which I actually am taking one now
00:15:51 --> 00:15:53 that is improving things a little bit for me.
00:15:54 --> 00:16:00 I've tried gummies I've tried you know over the counter sleep aids I've tried
00:16:00 --> 00:16:05 you name it done all day no screen time going to bed earlier no matter what
00:16:05 --> 00:16:10 time my body goes to bed it sleeps like a very specific amount of time it's
00:16:10 --> 00:16:13 two or three hours and then and then that's it and so I just,
00:16:14 --> 00:16:17 I think it was just honestly a conversation with my GP who said,
00:16:17 --> 00:16:20 have you ever thought about, you know, going on something to try and help?
00:16:20 --> 00:16:23 And at that time, Ambien was just emerging. This is like 20 years ago.
00:16:23 --> 00:16:28 I've been off Ambien for a long time. It was a fairly new drug at the time.
00:16:29 --> 00:16:33 And the doctor just said, you know, are you willing to try this?
00:16:33 --> 00:16:36 And I think at the time it maybe helped me get an extra hour or so.
00:16:37 --> 00:16:41 So I was like, okay, I'll stay on it because it was helping at least a little
00:16:41 --> 00:16:45 bit. It was helping the thing I was trying to fix. Okay.
00:16:45 --> 00:16:48 Yeah. So that was why. It had nothing to do with my dad whatsoever.
00:16:48 --> 00:16:50 I was just curious. Yeah.
00:16:50 --> 00:16:53 Yeah. No, valid question, but no, I had nothing to do with it.
00:16:53 --> 00:16:59 Do you feel like your relationship with food or with your body was helping you cope?
00:17:00 --> 00:17:04 Yeah, yeah, I agree with that statement.
00:17:05 --> 00:17:11 So people ask me all the time, a lot of my siblings, a number of them are alcoholics
00:17:11 --> 00:17:16 or they use marijuana to cope and I don't do any of those.
00:17:16 --> 00:17:20 And I was in denial, you know, kind of was like, well, I don't have any of those
00:17:20 --> 00:17:24 kind of had, but then I realized mine was food. Yeah.
00:17:24 --> 00:17:29 And I do remember there were times where I was embarrassed or ashamed of it
00:17:29 --> 00:17:33 and would hide, you know, what I was eating from George or if he came in and
00:17:33 --> 00:17:37 saw me eating something, you know, but he would never, he never, ever said anything.
00:17:38 --> 00:17:41 He loved me where I was at and never made me feel bad.
00:17:42 --> 00:17:46 It was more just me choosing that I could no longer live this way.
00:17:46 --> 00:17:52 So in 2021, I decided, okay, I'm getting off of this Paxil, and that was a horrific experience.
00:17:52 --> 00:17:57 Like, just look up, you know, the side effects of getting off of Paxil.
00:17:57 --> 00:17:59 What did you experience?
00:18:00 --> 00:18:04 They're called brain zaps, where your brain is literally, it feels like you're
00:18:04 --> 00:18:06 being electrocuted from inside your head.
00:18:06 --> 00:18:10 Oh, well, that sounds awful. And I would be mid-conversation and have to stop
00:18:10 --> 00:18:14 because I felt like being electrocuted from the inside.
00:18:14 --> 00:18:19 I see. Yeah, like, I didn't even know about the side effects.
00:18:19 --> 00:18:23 I just started experiencing these weird things and emotional,
00:18:23 --> 00:18:26 you know, I was all over the place, just crying all the time.
00:18:27 --> 00:18:30 And so I started, so I decided to look up, you know, side effects of,
00:18:31 --> 00:18:34 and I was like, oh, it's not in my head.
00:18:34 --> 00:18:37 So much of the time, I always think that I'm making stuff up in my head,
00:18:37 --> 00:18:40 probably because I was gaslit the majority of my childhood.
00:18:41 --> 00:18:45 And so I don't look things up for a while and then, you know,
00:18:45 --> 00:18:49 find out, oh, the stats and read up on studies. And it's like,
00:18:49 --> 00:18:51 oh, okay, so this is actually true.
00:18:51 --> 00:18:54 And BrainZaps is heavily documented.
00:18:55 --> 00:19:01 And it took about two, three months to get off of it. I weaned off of it very, very slowly.
00:19:01 --> 00:19:06 But I'm very grateful that I did. And just naturally getting off of that,
00:19:06 --> 00:19:08 I was nauseous. So I didn't eat a lot.
00:19:09 --> 00:19:14 And it was very weird to fill that full button. I mean, talk about I would serve myself a meal.
00:19:15 --> 00:19:19 And it was maybe half a cup of food, if that. And George was like,
00:19:19 --> 00:19:20 is that really all you're eating?
00:19:20 --> 00:19:24 And then I would eat half of that. So a quarter cup of food. I'm like, I'm full.
00:19:24 --> 00:19:29 Yeah. And so it was like my body had to learn all over again what it was like to get full.
00:19:30 --> 00:19:35 And so naturally, I just getting off of that medicine and we were going through
00:19:35 --> 00:19:38 an incredibly stressful time. That's a whole other story.
00:19:38 --> 00:19:44 Moving four times in 18 months. And I just I lost about I got really, really low.
00:19:44 --> 00:19:48 We were living in a one bedroom apartment, all four of us, while we were waiting
00:19:48 --> 00:19:51 for our house to be built. When you say low, you mean emotionally?
00:19:51 --> 00:19:58 Yes. I told George, it was around Christmas time of 2021, and I told him,
00:19:59 --> 00:20:03 again, we were living in a 500-square-foot, one-fandard-room apartment,
00:20:03 --> 00:20:05 all four of us, while we were waiting for our house to be built.
00:20:07 --> 00:20:13 And the stress of all of that, George working from home, the kids being homeschooled
00:20:13 --> 00:20:17 in such a tiny space in a small little town in central Virginia.
00:20:18 --> 00:20:22 And I told him, I said, you need to hide the guns. If they are in this apartment,
00:20:22 --> 00:20:24 I need you to not have them here.
00:20:26 --> 00:20:29 And he said, okay. And so he got them out of the apartment.
00:20:30 --> 00:20:34 And I just, I worked really, really hard. I thought I was going insane.
00:20:35 --> 00:20:39 And I ended up having... What made you, what was the thing that really made you feel that way?
00:20:40 --> 00:20:44 Just, I don't know, I was so erratic in my mind.
00:20:46 --> 00:20:49 But this is after you went off the medication. Yes.
00:20:50 --> 00:20:56 Okay. Yes, I was, I didn't think I had any reason to be feeling the way that I did.
00:20:56 --> 00:21:02 And so, again, I was probably gaslighting myself or convincing myself that it wasn't really that bad.
00:21:03 --> 00:21:07 And having, you know, suicidal thoughts, I didn't want to be here.
00:21:07 --> 00:21:12 And I just couldn't stop. And at this time also, I then decided to wean off
00:21:12 --> 00:21:18 of Ambien because then I started doing the research on being on Ambien long term.
00:21:18 --> 00:21:22 So I weaned off of that as well. So I think it was probably just a culmination
00:21:22 --> 00:21:26 of getting off of two medications that are not good for you mentally.
00:21:26 --> 00:21:28 They are not good for your brain health.
00:21:28 --> 00:21:33 I don't know if anybody's familiar with Dr. Daniel Amen. He is a world-renowned brain doctor.
00:21:33 --> 00:21:37 He's like the world's leading doctor on brain health. He has some clinics.
00:21:37 --> 00:21:39 I actually went and did his study.
00:21:39 --> 00:21:46 And they scanned my brain before at a normal active state, went back 24 hours
00:21:46 --> 00:21:50 later in a resting state, and they scanned it again.
00:21:50 --> 00:21:55 And what they revealed was extreme childhood trauma.
00:21:55 --> 00:22:01 Like what was going on in my brain was uh it was it was kind of like a revelation
00:22:01 --> 00:22:05 for me to realize that what I was experiencing and what I had experienced in
00:22:05 --> 00:22:09 my life was nothing that I had made up in my head there was actual physical
00:22:09 --> 00:22:12 changes within my brain that had occurred.
00:22:13 --> 00:22:17 That I had no control over yeah yeah and so it kind of just it gave me a little
00:22:17 --> 00:22:24 bit of I was kinder to myself well you know I think a lot of it a lot of any
00:22:24 --> 00:22:26 journey begins with that piece.
00:22:27 --> 00:22:31 You have to be kinder to yourself, especially when you're in the thick of it.
00:22:31 --> 00:22:34 You know, you're sitting there realizing when you look at a picture of yourself
00:22:34 --> 00:22:37 for your birthday that you don't look the way that you want to look.
00:22:37 --> 00:22:40 And oh my God, how did I get to be that size? And,
00:22:41 --> 00:22:46 You have two choices. You either can be kind to yourself in that moment and
00:22:46 --> 00:22:48 say, okay, well, I am here now.
00:22:48 --> 00:22:51 And this is the reality of where I'm at. And where do I want to go?
00:22:51 --> 00:22:56 What do I want to do with this understanding now, this knowing about my situation?
00:22:58 --> 00:23:04 And, I mean, thankfully, you chose to be gentle with yourself and to give yourself
00:23:04 --> 00:23:06 that kind of grace to be able to do what you needed to do.
00:23:07 --> 00:23:10 What did surviving that part look like to you?
00:23:11 --> 00:23:15 Like, were there moments that you, once you kind of locked in and decided,
00:23:15 --> 00:23:18 like, okay, this is not sustainable for me, it's not healthy for me,
00:23:19 --> 00:23:23 it's not where I want to be in my life, and you locked in. After that,
00:23:24 --> 00:23:25 were there moments where you locked in?
00:23:25 --> 00:23:29 Were you kind of wavered or wanted to quit? Or did it just kind of take off?
00:23:29 --> 00:23:32 Well, I just started losing weight naturally.
00:23:32 --> 00:23:37 Again, the stress of being in such a small, confined space with our children
00:23:37 --> 00:23:39 for much longer than we had thought.
00:23:40 --> 00:23:43 You know, we were only supposed to be living in that little apartment for six
00:23:43 --> 00:23:46 to 12 weeks. It ended up being eight and a half months.
00:23:46 --> 00:23:51 That's a lot. And, yeah, that's a really long time. And just this being in limbo
00:23:51 --> 00:23:54 of not knowing when our house was going to be ready.
00:23:54 --> 00:23:58 And I got to the point where my body started to reject food.
00:23:58 --> 00:24:04 Again, that's why I thought I was going crazy. I was no longer able to eat anything
00:24:04 --> 00:24:07 but broth, bone broth. I was sleeping one hour a night.
00:24:08 --> 00:24:13 And so in that process, I started to lose weight pretty well.
00:24:13 --> 00:24:15 I lost 50 pounds in two months.
00:24:16 --> 00:24:19 Oh gosh, that's a lot of weight. I lost some weight, you know,
00:24:19 --> 00:24:22 a little bit of weight when I got off of the Paxil months earlier and then I
00:24:22 --> 00:24:25 dropped 50 pounds super, super fast.
00:24:25 --> 00:24:31 I ended up going and seeing a naturopathic doctor and she diagnosed me with
00:24:31 --> 00:24:35 like I had a buildup of yeast in my digestive system, my intestinal tract.
00:24:36 --> 00:24:39 And that was why my body was rejecting food.
00:24:39 --> 00:24:45 Stress is the number one thing that will have a negative impact on you.
00:24:45 --> 00:24:47 People do not realize what stress will do.
00:24:47 --> 00:24:51 Trauma is stress on your body, raising cortisol levels.
00:24:51 --> 00:24:55 Doing all the things that that is that is stress and
00:24:55 --> 00:24:59 you know it increases you know childhood trauma stress
00:24:59 --> 00:25:01 it increases abdominal fat i still to this day
00:25:01 --> 00:25:05 have a carry weight in my belly and that's
00:25:05 --> 00:25:08 okay it's just what my body has done all these
00:25:08 --> 00:25:13 years to protect me from all the things well it's what everybody's body i mean
00:25:13 --> 00:25:18 you look at anybody who has a high cortisol level if you have a high cortisol
00:25:18 --> 00:25:27 level your body is going to be burning muscle and not fat it's holding on to that it's that.
00:25:29 --> 00:25:34 Instinct to survive and not get rid of those stores of fat.
00:25:35 --> 00:25:38 And it throws your system completely out of whack.
00:25:38 --> 00:25:45 If you're at a constantly high level of stress, then your body can't process
00:25:45 --> 00:25:49 everything that it's taking in properly. So it hangs on to everything.
00:25:49 --> 00:25:54 And for most people, especially women, they hang on to it right in the middle, just like you did.
00:25:55 --> 00:25:58 Looking for mental health resources that actually fit
00:25:58 --> 00:26:01 who you are and where you come from then you
00:26:01 --> 00:26:04 need to check out the help hub it's not another generic wellness
00:26:04 --> 00:26:07 site it's a free inclusive online platform
00:26:07 --> 00:26:10 built for real people living real lives people
00:26:10 --> 00:26:18 managing stress anxiety depression trauma and abuse grief or suicide loss at
00:26:18 --> 00:26:22 the help hub you'll find the resources tools treatment options and trauma-informed
00:26:22 --> 00:26:28 content you need in the moment without having to dig through endless tabs or start from scratch.
00:26:28 --> 00:26:34 It's your place to land, to take a breath, and to find exactly what you need when you need it most.
00:26:35 --> 00:26:38 Visit thehelphub.co where the help you need is just a click away.
00:26:44 --> 00:26:48 Absolutely. And so we got into the house.
00:26:48 --> 00:26:53 I had so many tests done trying to figure out what was going on with me,
00:26:53 --> 00:26:54 why I was losing weight so quickly.
00:26:55 --> 00:26:59 And then just with the help of one of Dr.
00:26:59 --> 00:27:03 Eamon's doctors, one of his staff members that I was assigned with my case,
00:27:03 --> 00:27:08 we figured it out together that one of my stress hormones was extremely elevated.
00:27:08 --> 00:27:11 And so we worked together over the course of a few
00:27:11 --> 00:27:14 months and so doing that I got down and
00:27:14 --> 00:27:17 you know lost about 50 pounds with all that that happened getting
00:27:17 --> 00:27:21 off of medicines and stress and all that I lost 50 pounds hell without even
00:27:21 --> 00:27:28 trying and then you know we ended up moving back to Utah and settling in and
00:27:28 --> 00:27:34 then I just I wasn't on any antidepressant but I just started watching my weight go back up again.
00:27:35 --> 00:27:41 I didn't feel like I was in a stressful time. And then that's when all the deaths started happening.
00:27:41 --> 00:27:44 And there goes the stress again. Yeah.
00:27:44 --> 00:27:49 Slowly started gaining weight. And so I had heard about GLP-1.
00:27:50 --> 00:27:53 And, you know, there's a lot of stigma around it.
00:27:53 --> 00:27:57 There's a lot of negative, you know, there's a lot of chatter about it.
00:27:57 --> 00:27:59 I listened to the chatter for about a year.
00:28:00 --> 00:28:07 And I just decided I can't do this anymore. I cannot live in this body and approach 300 pounds again.
00:28:08 --> 00:28:11 And so I thought, you know what, I'm just going to take a shot in the dark.
00:28:12 --> 00:28:14 I'm going to try this medicine and see what it does for me.
00:28:14 --> 00:28:18 And so it's been about two years now that I've been on it.
00:28:18 --> 00:28:24 And I lost about 65 pounds very, very slowly.
00:28:24 --> 00:28:29 A lot of people lose weight really really fast on it i lost my weight over the
00:28:29 --> 00:28:34 course 65 pounds over the course of like nine months and well that's still that's
00:28:34 --> 00:28:36 still a lot of weight in a fairly,
00:28:37 --> 00:28:44 short time is it yeah sure that that much weight in only nine months time is
00:28:44 --> 00:28:45 a pretty significant loss.
00:28:46 --> 00:28:49 It was pretty transformative for me, though.
00:28:49 --> 00:28:53 I feel like it was relatively slow. And according to what I had read,
00:28:53 --> 00:28:58 if, you know, losing weight slower in whatever method that you choose,
00:28:58 --> 00:29:03 losing, you know, one to three pounds a week is more sustainable and easier for you.
00:29:03 --> 00:29:06 Your body doesn't go into shock necessarily. Most definitely.
00:29:06 --> 00:29:10 That's a healthy way to approach it. People are constantly trying to do these,
00:29:10 --> 00:29:14 you know, military diets and quick fixes and fasting and keto.
00:29:14 --> 00:29:22 And I mean, it's so overwhelming just to even know where to start because everything is so subjective.
00:29:23 --> 00:29:30 And what works for one is never going to work the same way for someone else. So it's hard.
00:29:30 --> 00:29:34 It's really, you know, I give you a lot of credit for researching it and looking
00:29:34 --> 00:29:38 into it and trying to understand it the best you could before you got involved
00:29:38 --> 00:29:41 with it. And, you know, and for you, it worked.
00:29:41 --> 00:29:46 For you, it worked. And it all too, I think a lot of it has to do with,
00:29:46 --> 00:29:51 you know, how safely you try and navigate the process. There are people out
00:29:51 --> 00:29:54 there who are just like, I want this weight off me.
00:29:54 --> 00:29:56 I mean, I know people who are like, I can't live this way anymore.
00:29:57 --> 00:29:59 I want it as fast as humanly possible.
00:30:00 --> 00:30:03 And that's not healthy, and it's also not sustainable. And those are also the
00:30:03 --> 00:30:06 people who put on twice as much weight on the other end.
00:30:06 --> 00:30:11 They may lose it for a period of time, and then they're putting it right back on, and then some.
00:30:11 --> 00:30:18 That's right. And I do know that people that have had severe childhood trauma,
00:30:18 --> 00:30:20 they're also at higher risk for type 2 diabetes.
00:30:21 --> 00:30:25 Cardiovascular disease, you know, chronic inflammation. In fact,
00:30:25 --> 00:30:30 before I started taking GLP-1, I was diagnosed pre-diabetic.
00:30:30 --> 00:30:33 So, had I continued on that path, I would have ended up diabetic.
00:30:33 --> 00:30:38 I had fatty liver disease, and then I had inflammation with all over in my body.
00:30:39 --> 00:30:43 And I just started taking this medicine, and within, I don't know,
00:30:43 --> 00:30:45 six months, fatty liver disease gone.
00:30:46 --> 00:30:51 Type 2 diabetes, pre-diabetes gone, inflammation way, way, way down.
00:30:52 --> 00:30:57 And so I was like, why would I not continue to take this medicine?
00:30:57 --> 00:31:02 Now, you know, I will say it's been, you know, I've literally reached just this
00:31:02 --> 00:31:07 month, my two-year anniversary, and I'm definitely not where I want to be.
00:31:07 --> 00:31:14 I still seemed to be fluctuating in this 10-pound weight between 230 and 240.
00:31:15 --> 00:31:21 And I got really frustrated with myself because I referred a dear, dear friend.
00:31:21 --> 00:31:25 You know, I told her about it, and she lost a lot of weight really quickly.
00:31:25 --> 00:31:26 And I mean, she looks fantastic.
00:31:27 --> 00:31:32 She's where she wants to be goal-wise, and she's actually working on weaning off of it.
00:31:32 --> 00:31:37 And I got really angry at myself because I was like, why can't I have that same success?
00:31:37 --> 00:31:42 And I had seen plenty of people out on social media. They lost all the weight they wanted to and more.
00:31:42 --> 00:31:47 But why am I still holding on to this extra 20, 30, 40 pounds?
00:31:47 --> 00:31:50 Why will my, and then I had to remind myself,
00:31:51 --> 00:31:56 Most people have not experienced the level of trauma that I have.
00:31:56 --> 00:32:00 There it is. You don't need me to tell you. You know exactly what it is.
00:32:00 --> 00:32:05 But, you know, you forget and you get impatient and you want what somebody else
00:32:05 --> 00:32:09 has, which is absolutely human nature. We are all guilty of that. I don't care who you are.
00:32:10 --> 00:32:12 I don't believe you if you say
00:32:12 --> 00:32:16 I don't care about what other people are doing. We all do to some degree.
00:32:17 --> 00:32:22 So it's no wonder, you know, you see how something's working with someone else,
00:32:22 --> 00:32:26 and we just naturally assume that it will do the same for us.
00:32:27 --> 00:32:30 And when it doesn't, there's a disappointment there. There's a little bit of
00:32:30 --> 00:32:37 anxiety and grief and probably anger and disappointment that it doesn't.
00:32:37 --> 00:32:40 So do you feel so
00:32:40 --> 00:32:44 then you ultimately you you lost about 100
00:32:44 --> 00:32:46 pounds which is a massive accomplishment and
00:32:46 --> 00:32:50 you deserve so much credit for that do you feel like
00:32:50 --> 00:32:54 the biggest change for you was physical or internal it
00:32:54 --> 00:32:57 was honestly it's physical to be
00:32:57 --> 00:33:00 you know just to look at myself in the because i've
00:33:00 --> 00:33:03 i've again not very many pictures to compare to but
00:33:03 --> 00:33:06 when i finally did like a side-by-side after about nine
00:33:06 --> 00:33:09 months and I saw the wait like I've shown people that didn't
00:33:09 --> 00:33:13 know me prior to now like people
00:33:13 --> 00:33:16 that I've just met within the last six 12 months and they're
00:33:16 --> 00:33:19 like I don't even recognize that other I don't
00:33:19 --> 00:33:22 even recognize that person that's over 300 pounds
00:33:22 --> 00:33:25 you do not even look like the same person so
00:33:25 --> 00:33:28 for me it's the ability to look
00:33:28 --> 00:33:31 at myself in the mirror look at my face and
00:33:31 --> 00:33:34 recognize this person right here and say
00:33:34 --> 00:33:37 that's me because at 300 plus pounds that person
00:33:37 --> 00:33:41 that was in the mirror or in the pictures that was not representative of me
00:33:41 --> 00:33:48 and so I know that for me it has had a positive impact on loving myself and
00:33:48 --> 00:33:54 accepting myself as me the reflection of me so I'm sure there's been some emotional and psychological.
00:33:55 --> 00:34:01 Positives for me as well. I think it was just the, and also the ability to be
00:34:01 --> 00:34:06 more active, play with my kids, go on 12 mile hikes through the Redwood National Park.
00:34:06 --> 00:34:10 You know, it was a struggle, but damn it, I did it. Yes. You know what?
00:34:10 --> 00:34:14 That 12 miles, that's a lot of miles for anybody, for anybody. Yeah.
00:34:14 --> 00:34:18 And so I was able to do a lot more things that I was not able to,
00:34:19 --> 00:34:22 that there's no way I would have been able to do before.
00:34:22 --> 00:34:27 But also, you know, as I'm approaching, you know, I'm 40, going on 41 and realizing
00:34:27 --> 00:34:31 that if I don't take care of my body now, I won't be around for the long term.
00:34:32 --> 00:34:36 That's right. Because again, also studies show that people that have had severe
00:34:36 --> 00:34:39 childhood trauma, do you know that they have a 20-year, like,
00:34:40 --> 00:34:44 their life expectancy goes down by 20 years? That's a startling.
00:34:45 --> 00:34:51 That's really shocking. I don't, I'm not surprised, but it, I mean, I guess maybe I am.
00:34:52 --> 00:34:57 It seems, that's a pretty stark statistic.
00:34:57 --> 00:35:02 So that's kind of where I'm at, where like, okay, so the average of my grandparents,
00:35:03 --> 00:35:05 they lived to be in their late 80s. Uh-huh.
00:35:06 --> 00:35:10 That would put me, if I, you know, based on the shit that I've been through,
00:35:11 --> 00:35:12 that puts me in my late 60s.
00:35:12 --> 00:35:17 Do I only want to live for another 20, 30 years? I certainly hope not.
00:35:17 --> 00:35:23 Well, good, because neither do I. I would like, I want you to go above and beyond all expectations.
00:35:24 --> 00:35:30 Yes, absolutely. And so it's a matter of saying, I get to prioritize myself.
00:35:31 --> 00:35:37 And whether you know so when it comes to like any kind of stress or anything that disrupts my peace,
00:35:38 --> 00:35:41 bye i just my nervous system can
00:35:41 --> 00:35:46 no longer tolerate the level of bullshit that i tolerated for damn near 40 years
00:35:46 --> 00:35:50 well i love that for you because it's never too late it's never too late to
00:35:50 --> 00:35:56 be the person that you want to be it just isn't if if somebody has a closing
00:35:56 --> 00:36:01 thought if somebody is listening right now and they are where you were,
00:36:01 --> 00:36:06 they have a lot of weight on them that they need to get off,
00:36:06 --> 00:36:10 want to get off for their emotional well-being, physical well-being,
00:36:10 --> 00:36:13 and they feel stuck in their body, what would you say to them?
00:36:14 --> 00:36:19 First of all, I would say that look at yourself in the mirror and just say thank
00:36:19 --> 00:36:21 you for surviving this long.
00:36:21 --> 00:36:25 Thank you for getting me to this point, and you...
00:36:26 --> 00:36:32 And realize that it's okay that you got to this point, you survived it,
00:36:32 --> 00:36:33 and you survived a hell of a lot.
00:36:34 --> 00:36:39 And then decide, do I want to live a long, happy life?
00:36:40 --> 00:36:45 And, you know, there's countless studies out there showing that if we do not
00:36:45 --> 00:36:50 get down to a more manageable weight, it really comes down to deciding small,
00:36:50 --> 00:36:51 small incremental steps.
00:36:52 --> 00:36:57 Just changing rather than eating a bag of chips for a snack, eat an apple.
00:36:57 --> 00:37:00 Literally, that is the biggest thing that I struggled with. And I can't tell
00:37:00 --> 00:37:05 you how many diets I tried where I would just go gung-ho, all this.
00:37:06 --> 00:37:11 And, you know, cold turkey, no snacks, no sweets, nothing. It's just not sustainable.
00:37:11 --> 00:37:12 Look, everything in moderation.
00:37:13 --> 00:37:15 I don't care what it is. Everything in moderation.
00:37:15 --> 00:37:19 And I will say the GLP-1 helped naturally with the cravings.
00:37:19 --> 00:37:22 It just, I don't care what people say about it.
00:37:22 --> 00:37:25 And yes, it is astronomical in cost.
00:37:25 --> 00:37:30 But that, this medicine, and if I have to be on it for the rest of my life, so what?
00:37:30 --> 00:37:35 If it helps me maintain and, you know, or lose weight or be happy...
00:37:36 --> 00:37:40 With who I am? Can't put a price on that. No. No. Absolutely.
00:37:40 --> 00:37:45 Because I know for a fact, if I inch back up and get heavier again,
00:37:45 --> 00:37:48 I'm going to end up in a dark place again.
00:37:48 --> 00:37:51 Yes, I was in a dark place a month or two ago.
00:37:53 --> 00:37:57 That's not to say that being skinny is going to fix all that.
00:37:57 --> 00:38:02 But it's a daily practice of choosing to want a better life for myself.
00:38:02 --> 00:38:07 And being at a healthy weight will make that one step closer to that goal.
00:38:08 --> 00:38:12 I love that. I absolutely love that. And I think this is such a powerful conversation.
00:38:12 --> 00:38:16 And I just, I love and appreciate you so much for being so vulnerable in everything
00:38:16 --> 00:38:19 that you share on this podcast, but being vulnerable with that too,
00:38:19 --> 00:38:20 and sharing that part of your story.
00:38:20 --> 00:38:24 Because I think it's just powerful for people who are struggling with their
00:38:24 --> 00:38:33 weight right now to hear, it's powerful to hear where you've been and where you are right now.
00:38:33 --> 00:38:37 So thank you for that, because I think it matters. I think it matters for people
00:38:37 --> 00:38:39 to hear it from someone who's experienced it like that. And that's the whole
00:38:39 --> 00:38:41 point of us doing what we do.
00:38:41 --> 00:38:47 So we'll end here because this was a beautiful conversation.
00:38:47 --> 00:38:53 And we will be back next week with another fresh conversation.
00:38:53 --> 00:38:56 And in the meantime, time everybody keeps surviving we
00:38:56 --> 00:39:01 will if you will thanks so much for listening and for being part of the survivors
00:39:01 --> 00:39:05 community no matter where you are in your story you're not alone and you're
00:39:05 --> 00:39:10 definitely not broken healing takes time and it looks different for everyone
00:39:10 --> 00:39:15 the fact that you're still here and still trying means you're already doing the hard work.
00:39:15 --> 00:39:19 If something in today's conversation resonated with you, please share it with
00:39:19 --> 00:39:21 someone who might need to hear it too.
00:39:21 --> 00:39:26 That's how we keep these conversations going and remind each other that there's always hope.
00:39:27 --> 00:39:29 And if you or someone you know is struggling, please remember,
00:39:30 --> 00:39:31 help is always out there.
00:39:31 --> 00:39:36 You can call or text 988 anytime to reach a trained crisis counselor like me.
00:39:36 --> 00:39:39 And for more mental health resources, tools, treatment options,
00:39:39 --> 00:39:43 and content to support your mental health, visit thehelphub.co.
00:39:44 --> 00:39:47 We're so grateful you're part of the Survivors family, and we'll be back next
00:39:47 --> 00:39:51 week with another honest conversation about life after the hardest things.
00:39:51 --> 00:39:55 Until then, take care of yourself and your people, and keep surviving.